Have a question about Toltec Wisdom?
Ask Sheri!

Dear Sheri,

I was in a relationship for 7 months with a girl. In our relationship, she was always the victim girl, who needed trust. And she trusted me and was always asking me questions about her problems. How to solve them etc.

I was like a counselor, but was tired about all those negativity and was too late to have my boundaries. And when I had my boundaries, I did it in a harsh and angry way. Now she does not speak with me at all. I think she lost all her respect to me.

When she lost respect, my inner child began crying because her attention was withdrawn from me. I tried the practices you have given me, and it helped a great deal. It took me 2 months, crying, being sad, asking my child, asking my villain, talking with them. I learned that if somebody withdrew attention, its not the end of the world. I would take care of my inner child in that situation, and I said to my inner child many times "I am here sweet child and will always be here."

Slowly slowly now I feel really very strong. I took back my power. Now my romance feeling for this girl is over. I do simply feel nothing for this girl, but only compassion. I see things very clear now. I am seeing the sadness in her, how she was so lonely, and how she wanted to trust me. She was lacking self respect and trust, and she was seeking outer trust.

One thing i want to ask is, what can I do about this girl? I respect this girl a lot because she needed help. She was honest. Now she is probably seeking other HERO guys to forget about her pain.

She probably thinks I just used her sexually, her mind could be finding excuses why I behaved like that. I was not a hero. And she saw my human side and now she is seeking other heroes. Should I speak with her "Princess" part and hammer her down with a strong email message about how she must end up seeking happiness in other guys.

Or should I just write a long email explaining what happened, who did what and why. But that is going to come across as needy and she will think that i want her back.

What can i do? A confused Hero.

Dear Sheri,

I love dogs... My first dog that died was only two years old and her kidneys gave out. I tried to get her on a dialysis machine, but they were not available then. Her heart started failing.. She was in the vet hospital and with much regret I consented to have her put to sleep.

The second dog lived with me for 15.5 years. She had bile leaking into her stomach and there was nothing the vets could do for her. They gave her an operation which made the situation worse. Despite the fight I put up for her, I had to let her go, but this time I would not let the vets give her an injection. I fought that she should go in her own time. This caused considerable distress to the vets, but I knew she was not in pain, and I felt I was respecting her journey by allowing her to go in her own time... which she did.

I have a dog now who is 13 and who has a malignant tumour. The vets say that they should put her down now. Again I don't agree. I have made an appointment with a homoepathic vet who says they have had success with tumours and can make her life more comfortable. The current vets say they can give her palliative care, but as far as I can see will fill her with drugs. Under healthy normal circumstances I would expect for her to live for another 18 months.

My question to you is, I know she is responsible for her part of the love/respect relationship we have, but 1. Do I have the right to end her life? 2. Do I have the right to keep trying to prolong her life? 3. Should I just let this tumour take her life without doing anything? If so, how much pain do I allow her to go through.

At the moment, I want to fight for her comfort without poisoning her body. I don't think I have the power to prolong her life. I know this is my mind torturing me, and I think it is not the treatment that is worrying me, I am projecting fear into the future about what I should do if she is in pain or really ill.

I would appreciate your assistance with this if that is okay.
A Pet Lover


Dear Pet Lover,

I think the question becomes do you REALLY know what the dog is feeling? As a doctor, I can tell you that humans feel pretty bad when they are dying (especially from tumors which ARE painful) and most of them would welcome a faster way to die. But we can't do that yet in our society - because family can have so many agendas that these things cannot be trusted. Personally - I would not want to hang around for 18 months dying slowly. I would prefer to live my life to the fullest and then go at that time. Of course I would want to make sure I was terminal first and had tried different treatments.

But the bottom line is this: I often see that people are not willing to let their pets go, not because they are truly offended by the vets suggestion but because of their own selfishness. Only you angel can determine the place you are coming from in all this. Perhaps the question is what would you want for yourself if it were you? There are no "right" answers here.

Blessings & love, Sheri

Dear Sheri,

I have problem with knowing what is the truth. I found out that when I believe that what I believe is a lie and I know what is absolute truth it's so easy to make change in my dream. But so often I know that what I believe is a lie, but I don't really believe it's a lie. I need a default point which I could take as absolute truth and then by comparison with this point know if what I believe is really lie or if it's the truth. I found out that change is difficult only if I make it difficult, but I cannot change because I believe that I am loosing part of myself and I am so afraid of it - and also afraid what people around me say when I change. At one point I know, there is no absolute truth in the world, and then how could I know what is lie and what is not ?

And another question is what I need to do. I am confused, because I read so many toltec books and every author suggests slightly different things and I don't know what to do first ... repeat positive affirmations ? abide with the four agreements ? work with emotions ? do not- doings ?
I found out that I could do only one thing at the time, so what to do ?

I found out that I could choose between two ways of thinking.

1) I could deny to myself what happened in the past, say positive affirmations, feel free and happy (that affirmations make me feel safe) , but still have so many fears about so many things, it's like I am lying to myself, but in the present moment I feel very good and it's pleasure.

2) I could go to my past (what I subconsciously believe about it) and really accept what happened (how I perceived world as a small child), but the more deeply I go, the stronger vulnerability, fear, hate and emotions of this kind I feel. It looks like, what I feel it is not because what happened in the past but because what I am saying to myself in present moment. But this activity makes profound and quick changes in my point of view than just repeating positive affirmations, because I subconsciously not believe that affirmations.

And even when I tell myself beautiful things and it's look like it's generating pleasant emotions, on deeper level I am still not safe. My mum told me that I was born 3 weeks before expected time by cesarean operation because she has some health problems and at that time I didn't want go out yet. I had only 5,2 lbs and than get to 4,5 lbs by jaundice, followed by another brain problem. She told me that I was very soft and sensitive child unable to adapt to the world and I was afraid of everything, my younger brother could beat me up and I had no defenses. So I have problems with security from the moment I was born. Could it be shock from forced birth ? Could I get to this place in my life by deep inventory and release that shock by this way or should I look for another way how treat my feeling that I don't feel safe. It looks like that that feeling is deeper than my emotional wounds even when I created those wounds by my sensitivity. It looks like that is primary cause of all my need of acceptance and others emotional wounds and agreements. When I was small child I was jealous to my younger brother, because I didn't have mum only for myself and I was punished because of it and I accepted that my mum don't love me and my dad don't love me either. I had strong need to be accepted (to feel safe) but from my point of view I failed. So how to feel really safe ?

It seems to me that all people are judging and criticizing me (even when they don't say any word out loud) - I subconsciously believe that there is something wrong with me and when people are praising me I believe they are saying it because I am wrong and they try to make me feel good. How could I be really sure that I am ok the way I am ? How could I be really sure that what I subconsciously believe is really a lie ? How could I know what is truth and what is lie? How could I overcame fear of losing myself ?

Thank You

Dear Confused,

Recapitulation is the hallmark of the Toltec path. It's going back into the past with compassion and clarity and re-writing all the old stories. I will give you a personal example. I was "abused" during my childhood and screamed at. I did not feel loved and was very angry. I created many defense mechanisms to survive. I had all kinds of stories around what was happening to me and why. The structure of my wounded mind made me who I was as an adult.

Upon doing this work I came to realize that no one hated me and my beatings had nothing to do with me. They had everything to do with my unhappy parents. I realized that they loved me so much and did not hurt me purposely, but because they were unhappy. It was not personal. It's just that love never looked the way I thought it should look and my expectations were never met.

When I deeply and truly understood the truth I no longer could be mad at my parents and forgave them. My whole relationship with them changed since I no longer projected anger and they no longer were forced by me energetically to feel guilty and then be angry in response. Now they are my best friends. The truth is nothing happened to me. Things happened in my life and none of it was about me. Life is not personal.

I no longer need to feel safe. What is that anyway? Safe is a ridiculous concept in a predatory universe. I am perfectly happy just living as I am. I do not need to make up a story about feeling safe. And neither do you as it is not truth.

Last of all you need to lose all of your "self" - the little ego self that feels afraid in the world and sees itself as something real and separate from life. Every spiritual seeker needs to experience the "petit morte" or little death. That means your ego dies - as the real you is eternal and cannot be hurt, is not vulnerable, and is perfection. To do so you must die to all your old beliefs and stories. This is simply another way of saying the same thing that all the spiritual teachers share.

Understand?

Blessings, Sheri

Dear Sheri:
I will try not to be long worded here; however a quick background might help. I started my Toltec journey some 2 years ago with the beginning of "Voice of Knowledge", "Four Agreements" etc. I kept giving these books away and having to buy more so the last trip to the book store resulted in buying your "Toltec Wisdom" and it is great. I have been working with it for a few months now. I am also a member of your website.

Now here is were my confusion starts. I was rather dismayed when I read a recommendation from you to go to an Oprah site; however I evidently said ok whatever, however now reading the March news letter and your political comments regarding our President (who totally uses fear to get his agenda passed) which is not the point of my confusion, each to their own Tonal believe. The point is, you as a Toltec leader of which I have really put a lot of confidence in through your book and website to help me with my journey, as I do Miguel, I am feeling really confused about you pushing your political beliefs and agenda on me. What does that have to do with true Toltec Wisdom and our journey regarding the Tonal believes of others.

Respectfully,
A Confused Warrior

Dear Warrior,

Good question! I will share my vision of things and hopefully it will make my words understandable. First of all, I recognize that I am always speaking to people who interpret what I am saying from their personal point of view not mine. In addition, I am speaking to people who are at all different levels of consciousness. The combination makes it challenging to communicate at all - in general. True communication comes only when concepts are totally removed.

I know that different people resonate with different information, opportunities and ideas. What I say gets people to think and react. Because of that action some folks will question what they are reacting to - realizing that reacting to anything in life is futile. Only perceiving and taking action based on what is - can be the closest thing to truth.

So coming back to your question. For me I agree with what Jesus said - By the fruit you will know the tree. For me, Bush for example, his fruit is a country wide and now world wide economic crisis. Motivated by egoic fear, he sees countries as separate, apart, enemies, entities to get something from. He operates on fear-based actions and that has created war and economic failure (not all his actions have been like that of course - just like all humans are responsible for love and fear-based actions). He is no different than all asleep people (I am not saying he is better or worse than any human). For me after having the experience of merging with infinite consciousness, I cannot engage or support those behaviors anymore since for me they are not truth. I do believe we have the right to defend ourselves if someone living in unawareness is trying to harm us - but without projecting rancor at them and understanding that this action will last only until a solution can be found. I align with what Thich Nhat Han says about war.

As for Obama, I recognize we do not have any fruit yet. But I do sense a different level of consciousness than Bush has. Very different. His speech is different and his energy is different. I am not looking at his politics per se - I am looking at his consciousness. He knows he is speaking to people who have a lower level of consciousness and knows how he must speak to their dream in their language (even if that awareness is not totally conscious). He is a great stalker (in my opinion) and says what he needs to do get the job done. Do I agree with anything he is doing right now? Well - I cannot say that at all. But I know this. If we fight everything he is trying to do, nothing will get done. Friction between dreams is futile - this applies in our personal lives as well. Whatever he is doing - action needs to happen (as long as he is not outwardly harming people, killing them or creating havoc of course - I am not saying to blindly follow someone for the heck of it). So until I see the fruit I cannot know anything but I am willing to take action so that we can go from there.

My issue is with people who are always angry and complaining about politics and project that anger into the dream. I do not have to agree with anything. All I need to do is take positive action with an open heart - action that helps as many people as possible even if it does not serve me at all. That is lack of selfishness for the greater good. Most people vote for themselves and what serves them. That is the level of consciousness we are operating on right now. I may not agree personally with Oprah or Obama personal point of view but I agree that they function on a different level of consciousness than most and that is what I support - not particular points of view. For me there is a huge difference.

So in conclusion, I do not care at all about politics and have no desire to impose anything on anyone. I have no agenda other than to raise consciousness and make people question their thought-forms. As a teacher I am ruthless towards my students. I will stalk them into a corner if I have to and I will use any method to do so. I can pretend to be mad, I can take actions that seems unlikely for my "personality" - anything. But it all has nothing behind it - it is simply to gain a response from a parasite and bring about awareness and action. Don Miguel would say and do all kinds of "crazy" things for effect - but he just does not care. And neither do I.

I feel blessed and have gratitude that you took the time to write and question me. That is the idea. If you gained something from this letter - great. If you go into resistance you will see the rigidity of your mental structure (your Tonal). The key is to see without judgment or opinion. What Buddhists call equanimity - the equalness of all things. I am not right or wrong - I am just sharing a point of view to challenge your mind, open your heart and help set you free. If I have accomplished that - then I am.

Blessings, Sheri

www.journeysofthespirit.com

Dear Sheri,

I have been in a very intense committed relationship with someone for years now. He is an alcoholic in recovery with over a year of sobriety. In dealing with and living with alcoholism I have been affected and am now facing my own character defects and correcting them. Here's the rub - he had asked me to marry him years ago in the active drinking days and I said yes, but not until he got sober. We have been through A LOT together, our love & relationship has survived the drinking days, incarcerations, unemployment, infidelity, suicide attempt, hospitalization (all during active alcoholism). I have loved him and supported him and believed in him and waited for him to become the man I saw in him & new in my heart he could be.

He got sober, got a steady job, started taking responsibility for his life and I was so proud and happy, I decided it was the right time to finally accept him as my husband. We were both giddy & full of love & happiness at our impending nuptials. I have learned a lot about my self being with him. I learned I could endure heart ache and heart break and still love someone with a pure heart unconditionally. I learned that I am a lot stronger person than I knew and that I am a very kind, compassionate, loving person. He has opened my world to many new things and thought processes as well. I believe we have BOTH grown and been bettered knowing each other. I feel my love, courage, strength & stability were a constant in his life leading to his sobriety. He opened my mind to Toltec, which I have embraced and much of which feels quite natural.

I always look for good in people & situations and have only ever wanted to love completely and have that returned if possible. I truly believe in my heart & spirit & soul that we were brought together & found each other so that we could both "get better", grow as individuals and as a strong union that nothing could break. My emotions and inner most feelings tell me that we are meant to be together for out lifetime here on earth. Now, flash forward, things have not been great, we had a fight & I fell right into old behavior and said things I didn't mean - he has decided that I "broke his heart" and now he’s not "in-love" with me anymore and wants to leave to pursue a different life. Truth is he "broke" my heart many times, but I always forgave him & loved him unconditionally. That is just who I am.

We are both studying Toltec Wisdom and I am confused - I embrace living my life with an open mind and open heart and when I do this and pray to my higher power I feel so free and alive, at peace and happy. I have so much love to give and love myself enough to know I deserve love and honesty from others. I understand that if they aren’t able to do that that perhaps they are not being honest with themselves. From a Toltec perspective how to you continue to love & trust when the person you love most is not being honest with you? He is now telling me that my actions, of which I have no idea & he can’t be specific, have caused him to want to drink many times in the past year. He claims that he married me for the "wrong reasons". He claims that I have pushed him away.

I have searched inside myself and have no idea what he is speaking of. He turned a room in our house into a "man cave" and during this past year of sobriety I understood that he needed a lot of time to himself to work his program - I gave him that. He started sleeping back there too, it was very hard on me, but I accepted it even though I felt it caused a huge hole in our relationship. We have been the best of friends for years, and now I have recently been catching him in many little lies.

He tells me how important it is for me to be impeccable with my word and have integrity, but where is his integrity & impeccable word when he is lying about so much? If he is walking the Toltec path would he expect something from me that he isn’t expecting from himself? Is he being authentic? I am questioning a lot right now & searching my heart and mind to see my part/my role. I am still in-love with him and this all just breaks my heart. I feel that I know that I cannot control the outcome, I do have very strong intuitions and unexplainable feelings though. I always have a sense about things that I can't really explain, just feel & if I listen to them they are usually spot on. I have sensed for along time that he would "get better" and leave & I addressed this with him as a fear (before we got married) – I understand that if we can confront our biggest fear that it no longer has control over us. I have been practicing quieting the mitote and not listening to it – I am listening to my heart and my emotions and they have always been honest with me. My heart tells me that it is not over between us, that we may need time apart to grow as individuals, but that ultimately we are meant to be together, to grow old together.

It seems that if we were both truly practicing the Toltec way that by sharing our fears and dreams honestly with nothing to loose we would naturally grow closer and more in-love with each other. I feel he is not being true to himself. I am very open and honest with my feelings. I ask questions to learn more, as I DO NOT want to go on assumptions. He resists my questions and has no answers. He become angry and defensive and says when he has answers he’ll tell me. It seems very controlling and manipulative to me.

What do you think? What would Toltec Wisdom advise? So, he is going off to school in like 5 days - I think this is a GREAT idea to better him, and he said he doesn't know what will happen after that. I am his wife and I married him for better or worse, in good times and in bad, when loving each other was easy and when it was difficult. Is this fair to me? Please, I welcome your opinion, as I have decided the Toltec path is the only way to inner peace & true happiness - for I am love. He is sober now & pursuing personal advancement - this is the time our lives should be better, it's the time I'd been waiting for - what happened. Was it ever real?

Thank you & bless you

Dear Friend,

I have answered your questions the best I could based on what you have shared with me. Please know that I have been very direct and forthright and some of what I have written may be difficult - but I hope you can sit with it all and see what may be going on in your life.

The best way to evaluate life is to focus on the what-is rather than your story about the what-is. The what-is is that everyone is dishonest from my point of view because they are always lying to themselves first and foremost - both of you are included in that. That is because we believe our story which is truth for us but for no one else. Besides - our story only serves to support our personal point of view and keep our belief system intact.

For me - staying with someone who is hurting themselves for years hoping that they get better may not be the wisest move. Why - because most of the time our sick beliefs are supporting those actions - things like "My love can change him" "I know deep inside he is a good person" and others. When we love ourselves we create a beautiful life for ourselves free of dream and conflict. Your dream seems to be one more of neediness, drama, difficulty, and suffering - than unconditional love. Unconditional love is detachment, freedom, space, peace, respect, non-control, and the acceptance that you cannot fix someone. A spiritual relationship for me is one where I walk besides a person in life for as long as the relationship is serving us equally. I do not see how being with him though all this drama has been serving anything but unhealthy beliefs in you as I do not see an equal relationship.

Now - Toltec is about being a warrior in life - and warriors do not blame anything in their lives on others. Your husband did not drink because of you, no person can break our heart, no person can do ANYTHING to us. There are no victims in life - only participants. This dialogue from him is utter nonsense and I for one would not tolerate that kind of story. Next - if he says he does not know what is going on inside him it is a lie. We all know - the denial system is a great way to not look at ourselves and take responsibility for our dream and even project our issues onto others. You may have to sit with the possibility that you have been with him out of neediness and your own issues (your role) and the same for him - and that he used you to get sober and now he does not want to take responsibility for his actions in his soberness. Also, you think you have been best friends for years - that I do not think is truth. Perhaps more like partners in crime - you assisted his parasite (ego-mind) and he assisted yours. Without awareness our subconscious makes our choices in life and we always have a perfect rationalization for those moves. I know for myself that no matter how wonderful a man may be I have no desire to be with an addict - a mentally sick person - for any reason. I do not need to validate my existence and have my help be a reason to prove my self-worth and reason to be loved - that is not my idea of love.

Integrity is wholeness. It is when you are complete by yourself and need no one. That is when you are most able to be in a relationship free of untrue concepts (like marriage is forever, we will grow old together, or whatever else you may have in your mind). Remember - emotions are reactions to a thought form that you have judged in your belief system. Feelings that come from truth and spirit moving through us are what is truth - not emotions. Feelings are very different and come from perceiving what-is directly - rather than seeing something, thinking about it, emoting about it and then taking action about it.

When I was in college there was a silly little hippy saying that went like this - If you love someone set them free, if it is meant to be eventually you will find each other again. I would take that saying and make it Toltec - If you love someone set them free to face their dragon, and if they resolve their issues and you resolve yours you will find each other again and be healthy and happy together.

I wish you the best on your path angel - be very ruthless with yourself (no-pity) and that will allow you to be honest - truth with love and self-respect.

Blessings & love, Sheri

Hi Sheri,

Several months ago I began to experience several types of dream states that I did not know existed, and have found very little information about. The closest description seems to be Toltec dreaming, but we have just begun looking into that, so I am not sure. These states feel different from lucid dreaming or astral projection. One difference is that in normal meditation my breathing slows down, but as the "patterns" are starting to happen that sometimes are like a doorway into elsewhere, my breathing rate increases, but nowhere near hyperventilation, just faster than during meditation.

One state feels like being in another universe, while sometimes still being aware of my body. Like when the phone rings, I can choose not to answer it and stay in the other place, or even move because the position I am in is not comfortable any more. The places are very different from here, and sometimes there are people. I have been able to talk with them, they seem like fairly normal people, some are like mentors, and sometimes quite average, like being at a mall with everyone going about their business, and it seems that they know I am a tourist there. What is strange is sometimes we can talk, or maybe it is telepathy, and I can understand, but whenever there is something written, it is in text that I cannot recognize, even though the formatting seems normal. (titles, paragraphs) Sometimes it is like windows, and I can choose to go into the ones that look good, sometimes I can stay a long time, other times I seem to get pulled out against my will.
Sometimes I am aware of having a body, and sometimes it is possible to fly. These places are very real, and I have learned some important life lessons there.

Another state is being awake and feeling being in my body, in the space that I am in, being aware that my eyes are closed, and looking around. I can see myself clearly, but the background is different. Sometimes it is very difficult to actually open my eyes and come back.

I only know one other person who has experienced these states, and he seems to have been born with the ability, but has not done anything with it. We are now starting to explore, and one of our next steps is to build a sensory deprivation tank so that we can go into these states without outside disturbance.

We would really appreciate any help, leads, experiences. Thank you

Dear Sheri,
I'm finding that as I view daily encounters with different eyes, it can be somewhat disconcerting! In the moment awareness, as I'm encountering another, sometimes leaves me not knowing how to handle/process this new information! Example: At lunch with 2 friends. Friend A is animatedly talking to friend B, for an extended length of time, about her recent trips to Russia and SW USA, never once looking at me; ie seemingly not including me in the conversation! Yes, I recognize that I'm taking this exclusion personally! Yes, I know I must shift my perception and not let this "friend" steal my Joy/take my power in the moment! BUUUUT, somehow I seem to be at a loss as to HOW to make that shift! How to go from a THINKING level to a FEELING level! And letting go of my judgmental thinking! By the way, this was the 2nd time, this happened with my lunch buddies! Now, I find myself re-evaluating this one friendship and feeling uncomfortable about making changes! Wondering if I really NEED to distance myself from friend A? And if so. not to feel guilty about it! And what about my relationship with friend B? AAAGGGGHHH!
I would much appreciate your feed-back, Sheri! Thank you for choosing JOY!
With Love and Gratitude

Dear Friend,

There is nothing to do with your friends - the issue is in your perception and judgment of your friends. You are not a victim - if they are "ignoring" you - pipe up and talk with them rather than sitting quietly and feeling bad. Life is actually simple once you let it be that way. All your conflict is coming from opposing thought forms in your own mind not from anything outside of you. The tough part is seeing that in the moment and taking responsibility for our own thinking!
Blessings & love, Sheri

Hi Sheri,

English is my second language so maybe there will be some grammar mistakes. I'm 19 years old and Toltec way is way of my heart. I am only one person in my family who is interested in this way. There is problem that there is sometimes not impeccable environment around me. I don't watch TV, because I see nonsense in it and I don't listen to music with harsh language, but my parents and my brother is still watching TV, cursing and using harsh words (it's their program and they don't know it). I don't have opportunity to leave this environment. I am happy until I hear cursing or TV, then I am going mad. I want to respect my parents and brother and don't argue with them about what they are watching in TV, listening to and how they speak to each other, but I don't want to be witness of cursing and harsh language around me. My program is telling me, that my environment is trying to stop me in my impeccability and it use situation around me to make me mad and emotional. What I have to do ? Fight circumstances or surrender and listen to harsh language and cursing around me ? I know, that if I am free I don't react to the circumstances around me.

Another problem is that I am afraid and shy to pray, perform rituals, stalk and read aloud toltec books when there is somebody in the same room with me, because I don't know what they will do. I am afraid that they say that Toltec way is problem and they will try to make me "normal" according to them. So I wait until they are not there around me or I get angry with them because of their presence. I think this is only my program holding me back and trying to misuse this kind of situation against me and others. Now I have not money to leave. They are great parents but I am afraid what they will do, when they find out that I am doing something what they do not support. Toltec way of life is the only thing I really want in life now.

Is there any solution to this situation ? I know that it's funny to do Toltec way and to be afraid that parents will try to stop me in it, but I cannot help it. Is there something I must be aware in my program or I must do?

Thank you, Trying hard at home

Dear Trying hard at home,

Your English is just fine and it is wonderful that you wrote me. There will always be things in life that we cannot change. One of those things is family. We must respect their right to be exactly the way they want to be. It does not matter how we judge them. If we do judge them according to our "enlightened" point of view - are we really being enlightened? No we are not. And in addition we are taking them personally. That of course is not freedom.

If you are still young and living at home - you can teach be being the best person you can be - not by judging your family and making it seem like you are better than them - that is just ego. Enjoy and love your family and when you feel that the conversation is not good for you - leave the room, take a walk, listen to some music or call a friend.

If you cannot detach from judging them and getting upset - you are using new "knowledge" to condemn others with. In other words you are using your spiritual path to hurt them and yourself since you are the one getting angry. The go mind/parasite will do anything to keep in charge. The key is to detach and be happy. If your happiness depends on your external circumstances you will never be at peace and be happy.

One of my first rules of life is: People do what they are going to do and it isn't always what you want, wish or hope for. If you can come to peace with this piece of advice you will always be happy even if you are in the middle of hell.
Blessings & love, Sheri

Dear Sheri,

I was hoping you could help me. I just recently started reading Don Miguel Ruiz's book The Four Agreements. I am at a part on page 64 where he says "If others say one thing, but do another, you are lying to yourself if you don't listen to their actions". I realized that I am the other. I say to my boyfriend that I love him all the time, but then if he makes me feel bad, through no fault of his own, I shut down to make him feel bad. I really do love him, but do i really love him if I keep doing this? I don't want to break up with him, but I care about him to keep doing this to him. Can I be helped or do my actions speak louder than my words?

Thanks, Taking it personally..

Dear Taking it Personally,

Thank you for your note. My guess is that you do love him, but your need to feel safe and control him overrides you ability to simply share you love without conditions. People say all kinds of things all the time. If you always take peoples words and deeds personally you will always be unhappy and in reaction. That puts you in the victims seat and that is not truth. You are not a victim. If something someone says bothers you - before you open your mouth think about what it is in you that is causing that persons words to tweek you. Take responsibility for that and communicate without getting emotional - what is going on for you. Rather than getting upset, explain what caused you to get upset and why. Then you are taking responsibility for your reaction and you are letting them know why you are upset. Then let them know that you are going to do you best to work through how you are feeling. It is best if you stop trying to punish him and manipulate him to control his behavior. A good conversation is much more effective than punishment and feels a lot more loving.
Also, know it takes two to tango. Maybe your boyfriend could work at being more impeccable with his words on his side.
Blessings, Sheri

Hi Sheri,
I have been receiving your emails for years and they have always been great. I have a question and I thought of you. O.K. I have been with this man for over 7 years and one of his dreams is to be a motivational speaker, and believe me I know he could do it. He has this aura about him that no matter what forum he may be in when he speaks you can hear a pin drop in the room. He first started in the church he studied to be a minister and he was great but during that time he knew that wasn't really what he wanted to do that is when he got really involved in reading Don Miguel's books and he found something he totally believed in. So my question is this is. His passion is touching and inspiring people to grow with in themselves. I know, from speaking on a personal level with this man he makes me feel I can move mountains . How does one get started to be a motivational speaker? That is where he is stuck at. He wants it but yet does not really know how to get started. I would LOVE to help him reach this goal because he has helped me in my journey to meet mine and I know how much he could help others (and already has) so if you could give me so ideas about how he could make his dreams could come true it would be one of the greatest gifts you could help me give him.

Thank you so Much for Your Time,
Wants to help

Dear Wants to Help,

As you can see passion is nice - but how can he inspire others if he does not have absolute faith in himself? He must learn to own his power by talking action in life one small step at a time. It is not your responsibility to do anything for him - or you will not allow him to come into his power. (However, you can help him to help himself.) If he makes you feel like you can move mountains - why isn't he moving his own mountains? Not knowing how to do something is not an excuse. There are many people in this dream that can help us do anything - but we need to ask for ourselves and feel we are worth it - and get out there and speak to people in that field to learn.

I had no idea how to become a speaker - I simply started taking action to contact places to speak in my local area - even if it was for free or for love donations. One must build a reputation based on action not words. So yes he has the talk - but for someone to really listen they must see us walk that talk. If people see him out there taking action - that is inspiring. For me I don't care how good someone sounds - what makes me excited is what they have created for themselves due to their faith in God working through them.

Does that make sense?
Love, Sheri
www.journeysofthespirit.com

Sheri,

I have studied the Toltec path for a while and the 4 agreements, however there is one situation that still has me reacting. It's my PTSD. Recently the studies of this disorder is that when trauma happens, new pathways of neurological functioning are created in the brain that are often deeper than normal pathways of a normal functioning and feeling person. When a Toltec practitioner is working with not taking things personal, yet the neurological damage has been done, what do you advise? So far, if I am on zoloft which helps PTSD, I can practice not taking anything personally pretty easily, but if I am off the zoloft, it takes a while of it getting out of my system and if a situation happens that re-enacts the original trauma, I start reacting in a way that my rational mind knows better. I can experience the trauma all over again yet see that I'm out of control, but there is no control at that point because the brain is reacting to the threat - not me.

What advise do you have for Toltecs with PTSD or for war veterans who deal with this everyday. It seems without medicine, practicing the Toltec path is very hard. I am no longer on medicine but I'm believing that the only way for me, a person with PTSD with different brain functioning than others (proven) the only way to practice this 'not taking it personal' is to be on zoloft.

Do you know anyone on the Toltec path who has gotten past PTSD? I'm only triggered in one situation but that one situation is my downfall. It sends me down before I realize what is happening, but all other areas of my life seem great. Also, I have Complex PTSD from severe abandonment and constant threats of my survival by my father as a child and then I was raped. The rape was easy to recover from and I am no longer unable to be intimate or be open, but if someone leaves me, the trauma is experienced severely and immediately. Because I only fall for spiritually minded men, most of them talk about being impeccable, but they never are impeccable. The free will to change their mind makes them out of integrity because they use that as an escape clause instead of commitment to their words and intentions.

What advise do you have? Also, if a person is on zoloft and they do the Toltec path easily because they are on medicines, do you consider their 'level' of attainment is real? I know there are levels in your path, the nagual level and all that...but what if the only way a person can function on that level is thru taking a medicine because of the way the brain was damaged during trauma?

I know these are loaded questions. But this is where I am at with it all.

Thanks
Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

You have asked a lot of questions and I can only answer your briefly but I will do the best I can.

First of all, everyone has trauma as there are few people that had perfectly lovely upbringings. All events and agreements create neural patterns. All neural patterning can be changed. I do not care what the event was. This is what the new study of neuroplasticity is.
http://psyphz.psych.wisc.edu/web/News/wsj_1-19-07_begley.html
The fact that you are triggered is not an excuse - no more than it is for any other human on a spiritual path trying to get over their deeply ingrained habit behaviors.

But if you believe that your trauma was special - that very belief will make it difficult to move beyond where you are. You also have an agreement that you are a victim of those neural patterns and I can assure you that you are not. You can be in control of your reactions right now but you are not choosing to be. I have had the experience of rape, beatings and other traumas in my life, and I have managed to work my way though them and so can you. You are not your brain - you are the entity that is in charge of your mind and your body. And yes, we have worked with plenty of vets that have gotten over their war trauma.

Again - your beliefs are the whole problem angel. For example - you still believe you were abandoned. No one can be abandoned - people can leave your life because they choose to but that has nothing to do with you. In other words people do not leave your life because of YOU. They leave because of them. Once you no longer believe in the human concept of abandonment you will no longer have that issue. Then you will not take anything in the future that looks like abandonment personally - because you will no longer believe in that concept.

Right now you are filtering your current life through your old agreements. That is why you want a commitment from people - something you will never get since you cannot commit to a relationship. All you can commit to is to do your best. How can you possibly be in your integrity and promise to stay with someone forever when you do not know how you will feel about them tomorrow? This is just not possible!

There is nothing at all wrong with staying on your medication until you work through these issues. But ultimately you must work on your beliefs and take responsibility for them. Hope this helps and do keep working on yourself - preferably with a teacher who can reflect to you what is not truth.
Blessings, Sheri

Dear Sheri,
It was fifteen years ago that I started reading the teachings of don Juan by Carlos Castaneda. I found out that I the dreaming practices came easy to me. However, I suddenly began to notice that things were becoming too real. Objects became more solid and I had difficulty waking up into the reality that my body lives in. For this reason, I stopped my practices because I had no guide. Recently I have picked the books and found that I still have the ability to find my hands, spin on my heels, etc. Last night I got so deep into the dream that I had a hard time finding my way back to my body. Should I once again abandon the path or is there something I can do to feel a little bit more secure? I feel like I'm treading on shaky ground. p.s. I love your book!!

Dear Dreamer,

The question is what is your intent in doing those exercises anyway? Perhaps it is time to look again at why don Juan suggested to Carlos to do those things in the first place. Not what Carlos thought the reason was - but don Juan's reasons which are two different things. The first purpose of those exercises for me is to have the experience that we are dreaming all the time, during the day and at night. None of this is "real" unless you consider that electrical impulses translated by your brain of pure energy is "real." You are a slave of the machine that interprets your really for you until you no longer are. When you have this deep realization born of your experience then you begin to have fun in life knowing that this is a dream, an illusion and you can have gratitude of the mystery of it all and you no longer will have anything to defend or argue about.

Your energy body will always be connected with your body. It is only your ego-mind that has created this story and this fear. So far you always are back in your body yet you cling to a thought form that says you may not get back to your body. Is that truth based on your experience? Again the idea of dreaming is to understand who you are - an unlimited consciousness that is in a body and has use of a mind.

Dreaming exercises are not to be flying around the universe for mindless uselessness. It is to be able to transcend your mind and body and claim your true self. Who cares if you can see your hands or spin on your heels? Those exercises were given so that Carlos could get control of his ATTENTION and are of no importance in and of themselves - attention is the only thing we have as conscious beings that we can use to create our reality. So far your mind seems to have control of your attention rather than who you really are. I strongly suggest you work on yourself, your beliefs and mental strategies and when you no longer are held down by them and you no longer believe your won thought forms your dreaming will become something else without you having to try.

I am glad you are enjoying the book - it is to assist you in obtaining your personal freedom. What you are doing right now is not freeing you nor is it giving you clarity that can lead to freedom. Perhaps if you read the books again from the 3rd one to the end you will see how Carlos states that he did not understand his teachers intent and that he took action that did not lead to his freedom. In the end you must also realize that much of the book is fictionalized and rather than reading literally, perhaps it is best to get the flavor or the feeling behind his teachers words. The most important thing in life is the quality of your human relationships and the ability to express your love boldly. Go for it!

Blessings & love, Sheri

Hello Sheri,

I would like your advice on how to deal with people towards whom you feeling loathing and irritation. I know such feelings are a dreadful waste of personal energy but how
do you conquer them and what happens if these feelings are caused by a particular person and avoidance is not an option?

Thank you!

Dear Friend,

First of all - no person deserves your loathing, projection of fear-based energy and judgment. If you stop your judgment of them you will not longer have those emotions. The way the human body works is like this: perception, judgment, emotional reaction. You cannot have an emotional reaction unless you see something and judge it first. Your peace and centeredness depends on you learning to deal with your judgment. Everyone is entitled to live their life as they choose even if they are not necessarily kind. Action-reaction will take care of them in time. You however - are not in the position to judge and neither am I or anyone for that matter. So rather than looking outward - how about if humanity on a whole starts looking inward and begins to take responsibility for the way they think and behave? The only thinking and behavior you can change is your own - so that if where you must start - not with others. All people are divine beings and when you start treating others like they are divine you might be surprised what comes back to you. However - if you hold judgment towards others they will feel your energy and be defensive towards you. When you stop projecting anger out towards other you make the space for something else to happen. Forgiveness is the key.
Love, Sheri

Dear Friends,

Please do not miss watching this video.
Blessings, Sheri

http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/view/id/229

Sheri: I would like some information on dealing with my anxiety around the issue of betrayal.

Dear Friend,

Certainly I cannot answer that question in one email nor would I try! But I suggest that you read my book as it gives you great tools for identifying the beliefs that you are being challenged by. In other words you are not being affected by a persons actions - but by your concepts about betrayal. No one can be betrayed - only your ideas about how that person should behave can be betrayed. If you live the truth - in other words you deeply understand that people do what they are going to do and it isn't always what you hope, want or wish for - you will always have joy. The reason is you will always expect people to act from their beliefs, fears, and programming. It never surprises me when people behave in all different kinds of ways - and in the end it shouldn't surprise you unless you expect that people will always behave the way you would like them to.
Does this help?
Blessings, Sheri

Dear Sheri,
I have been in a three month relationship. It has been the first one in two years and I really care for this person. I think I liked him so much, I had the fear of losing him most of the time and seemed to walk right into exactly that. The green eyed monster of jealousy reared it ugly head so to say two weeks ago on my part. Not that bad, but bad enough that words were said between us, too many, and since then things have not been the same to the point of breaking up. I could not get it to turn back to the loving feeling prior to the words that we exchanged.
I have been following your teachings and Buddhism teachings and know better than to feel how I am feeling. It really hurts knowing I may never see this person again and I am having trouble sleeping, eating, working. I know this is silly and what the teachings would say. But how do you stop that awful hurt feeling and live without forming attachment. It is so hard. It seems easy to say it until it presents itself and there it just comes right back, like all that I have learned went right out the window.
Thank you for all you do! Sleepless in Florida

Dear Sleepless,

Nothing is wrong with what you are feeling ever - it is your alarm system for what you are thinking. So you would be best served reviewing your fear-based beliefs about relationship and your self-worth. If you do not think you are worthy of love you will be fearful and want to control what little morsels of love come your way. That will compel you to behave in ways that create the very outcome you fear most. Since you created that very thing now you are beating yourself up for taking that action which is more lack of self-worth. Let it go angel. Love, Sheri

Dear Sheri -

I am not sure how to get from "here" to "there". My mind is absolutely a control freak. I have been using meditation to work on "stopping the chatter". It is helping, and I can see some increase in my ability to silence my mind. It is slow going, though, and I can feel strong resistance from my mind. At present, I see through the illusion of the story I've created a much smaller percentage of the time than the amount of time I believe the illusions. I have, however, begun to question my stories most of the time. I just seem to lack the absolute faith that the "no-thing" I am is not bound by these beliefs... in addition to the fact that I can feel my mind is terrified of loosing its power and is doing everything it can to keep me believing the stories. I will keep up the battle. I am about a third of the way through "The Complete Idiots Guide to Toltec Wisdom", so am looking forward to what lies ahead. I will certainly try some of the exercises in your book, and will save your email to read again when I need inspiration.

Thanks!

Dear Friend,

The entity that is saying this: "I am just not sure how to get from "here" to 'there" is never going to know. Confront your stories and fear-based beliefs and the rest will fall into place. The "I" that is writing me is never going to have faith in the real you - and why should it? What is involved is seeing the world through the point of view of the real you not your mind. Your mind does not need to have faith in what is already eternal within you. Just stop believing that you are your mind and that the entity that is communicating with me is "you." I can assure you it is not.

Blessings, Sheri

Hi, Sheri -

Let me tell you what I get from reading your response, and please let me know if I have gotten the message correctly.

I feel like I am behind this huge stone wall (my "mind", my "stories") and past the wall is the infinite. I am seeing cracks in the wall, and when I look through the cracks, I can sense that the infinite is there. In my last email, I was asking you how to get through the wall. What you are telling me is that the wall only exists because I believe it does. If I truly realize that the wall is not really there, I will have made the first step.

Thanks so much for your guidance !!

Dear Friend,

YOU ARE THE INFINITE. The fact that you are saying you (the "I") senses cracks in the wall shows exactly what I am talking about. You believe you are your mind and you are taking the point of view of your mind. Your mind perhaps senses the infinite through the cracks in your fog or story. But the way to get from here to there is to use your attention to change your point of view. It is the fact that you believe your stories that has you focusing your attention behind the wall of fog. But by detaching from your stories the fog will dissipate and your mind will be able to expand to meet the infinite that you are.
Love, Sheri

Hi Sheri,
I'm sure you've probably addressed this in the past, but I'm wondering what your advice is for dealing with emotional issues as they come up to be released. Is there an easier way to let old beliefs go as opposed to a "harder" way?

Thanks!

Dear Friend,

THAT is a loaded question! First of all I do not know how you are approaching your issues. The emotions are never the problem as the emotions are simply the correct way for your body to respond to your fear-based stories and beliefs. So it comes down to addressing what is not truth in your mind. There is only one way to address lies and that is to make sure you really know what is truth and to take action in life based in that. In the end it is not hard to let go of a lie unless you insist in allowing yourself to be further abused by it or enjoy suffering.
Does that make sense?
Love, Sheri

www.sherirosenthal.com

Hello, Sheri -

I have been on a spiritual journey for about 6 months now, but just discovered the Toltec way, and in particular your writings and website. It is completely in line with the path I have been meandering (through Buddhism and various New Age writings), and I am hoping will take me to the next plane. My question is as follows:

Many of the jobs I have had over the years focus on developing and implementing business processes. I have been exposed a number of times to personality tests, ALWAYS testing as introvert. The point here is that I am a flaming introvert. My job was recently changed to focus on training and International travel. I have 30 yrs invested and 3 years left to go to reach full retirement at 55 yrs of age. I want to "stick it out". However, being as introverted as I am, the new intense work situations leaves me feeling exhausted. If I am on a week long travel jaunt, I am often awake after only 3 hrs sleep each night, with the physical discomfort of feeling like adrenalin is pumping through my body. By day 3 I am severely sleep deprived, and then am sometimes sick by day 5 (e.g. cold, bronchitis, pneumonia).

Do you think I am bringing this physical reaction on myself ? I am at wits end to figure how to manage it. Since I have started on my spiritual journey., I have had on 2 occasions a paradigm shift for a brief 5-10 minutes each, during which I could "see" the smoke and mirror illusion my ego has created. During both of these instances, I was in an extremely stressful situation and suddenly felt very calm, and the difference between the "Tonal" and the "Nagual" became crystal clear. During both instances, I was about as uncomfortable physically and/or mentally as I could possibly be, and had "turned over" the pending situation to my inner Self. From your writings, I am theorizing that, in fact, it was that discomfort and the resulting total faith in my Self (because it was the "last resort" of the day) that led to the "crack" in the illusion of the Tonal.

What a wonderful feeling those 5-10 minute revelations brought! What I would really like is to find a way to advance the Awareness without taking myself to the brink of mental and/or physical collapse. Or is this the nature of the journey? Any insight you could give me on how to get through these periods of stress, or on how the Toltec journey can relate to this would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks so much for your writings and website !!

Dear Not Really an Introvert,

You are not a flaming introvert unless you choose to believe that nonsense. You are no-thing that lives in a body and possesses a mind that sees itself as an introvert. That's a big problem. So yes, you are making yourself sick because your job is going "against" your idea of yourself. If you change your idea of yourself then you will see that you are simply in a job and you will do your job. All the judgment you have about what you are required to do is causing the emotional reaction within your body and causing you to feel sick. It is that simple.

First step - focus on the "what is" - in other words stop making stories about everything - like your personality and even your spiritual path. Get serious with your programming and address what you believe about yourself and challenge that. There is no job that you cannot do if you open your heart and mind and just have fun. Your mind has you prisoner with all it's internal dialogue and thinking. Stop analyzing and when you lay down at night let the day go and rest and focus on the gratitude you have for your life - rather than what you did not finish today and what is wrong with you and the world.

You thankfully had a moment of clarity to see the what is - that is why you felt calm, you took the point of view of you as no-thing for a second rather than the point of view of your limited mind. You saw the illusion of this reality. Great! So either you will believe what is truth or you will believe and all the nonsense your mind is constantly proposing to you. Your path can be easy if you make a choice to believe in the truth in every moment. That's the challenge. Stop making it so hard. There is nothing to manage - but everything to LET GO of - your mental control. Once you stop judging the entire reality changes and life is easy.

It is not necessary to make yourself sick at all on your path. That is just one more way to hurt yourself, which is what people are doing to themselves all the time. Happiness is a choice and so is misery. Your choice. In my book there is an emotions page that has an exercise on it that will help you get clarity about your fear-based beliefs. I suggest doing that everyday - it changed my life.

Love, Sheri

Dear Sheri,

I just read the January 2008 newsletter - & am astonished to see a recommendation to read the books by Carlos Castaneda.

How can I or any other data-driven & critical thinker have any confidence in someone or some organization that promotes the work of a discredited charlatan, sexist, pathological liar, alleged rapist, & successful fictionalist?

There was a time, in the 1970s--when I was a young adult & read Castaneda's books (anything about him too) with great interest & credulity. In the years since a veritable explosion of information & other evidence has emerged that undermines completely Castaneda's musings on Toltec shamanism & his other assertions.

What are you beliefs, Dr Rosenthal, regarding these well-founded challenges to Castaneda's truthfulness & awful exploitation of people?

Regards, a questioning soul

Dear Questioning Soul,

I am going to answer your question - but use what you wrote to me as a teaching opportunity - if you do not mind. The best way from me to answer your question is in the form of a Toltec lesson - so to speak - so please humor me here.

The Toltec path is about becoming free from our beliefs, judgments points of view and opinions. It is absolute freedom form the ego-mind - not unlike Buddhism which is another warrior's path. I know many people love Toltec and it resonates with them, however they do not apply the teaching to themselves, their thinking or their actions. As a former physician who we could say possesses a very critical mind, this path has been nothing short of the hugest challenge of my life. I thank God for don Miguel's assistance in pointing out to me the subtleties of my ego, dogmatic thinking, and attachment to my domestication. The most powerful words of wisdom I received from him to accomplish this was: Don't believe him, don't believe myself, and don't believe anyone else. (In The Voice of Knowledge)

So having said that - do I know for sure that anything that anyone has written about Castaneda is truth - even the book written by his wife or the book written by Amy Wallace? Yes, I have read them all. And so what? Maybe all of it is truth, maybe part of it is truth - but what I know for sure is truth is that whatever people have written is only their person point of view based on their judgments, beliefs and opinions. I am not saying I am disregarding those opinions - not believing people's minds, including my own, is not about being stupid. I am saying that I recognize that they are those people's points of view which by nature can NEVER be absolute truth.

I have no idea if what Castaneda wrote is truth or not or if "don Juan" ever lived. But I do know that some of the material would have been difficult to make up - having experienced most of what was in that book myself with my teacher. So maybe he borrowed the whole thing from another Shaman's writings - who knows? But those books had a profound effect on my life and were the inspiration for me finding a teacher and changing my life. I personally love the books (at least most of them) and so does don Miguel Ruiz. I can enjoy the books as interesting works of fiction without believing them totally can't I?

Now here is the kicker. If I allow my judgment of him as you have said below - to stop me from reading those books, my life would not be as it is today. If I have learned anything from this path it is this: NEVER allow my mind and it's judgment to edit my actions EVER!! Your judgment may stop you from taking actions that could change your life. Instead allow life to drive you, not your ego-mind with it's judgmental points of view. Do you think the Infinite cares about Castaneda's books? I can assure you that consciousness does not as it does not judge - in fact it does not care as life is not personal. However - this universe is based on action-reaction. So whatever Castaneda did in his life - he will have to deal with. Maybe his liver cancer is the result of his actions, maybe not - but that is his business not mine. But for sure it is not up to me to judge him or anyone else. I agree with Jesus's words on that matter - do not judge lest you be judged. Every spiritual path asks us to transcend judgment because it asks that we transcend the ego-mind.

Our mind is an assistant unless it is your master. I encourage you to use your mind yes, but not be ruled by it or to allow it to make choices for you in life. Those actions are best taken from the heart not the mind. If you take the action, for example, to never go to my website again because of my answer to you or because you think I am "wrong," that action could change you life as you would be removing yourself from information that might change your life - or not. Of course I cannot know that for certain - but I know that removing myself from situations based on choices my mind has made has never been successful. Safe perhaps, but not wonderful in the end. It took a lot of self honesty to recapitulate my life and admit that to myself.

Since we create our reality and emotional state from what we think - I encourage you to be careful what words you use when you speak as that is true impeccability of the word. You have used some charged words which are fear-based and you will always have an emotional reaction if you use them as will the people who hear them when you speak them. If you want peace in your life it is imperative that you use your word with caution.

So in the end - I feel quite comfortable in suggesting people read his books because they are filled with a library's worth of important information woven around the fiction. Many times my teacher would be trying to teach me something that I just did not get. Later I would end up re-reading the books (as I also read them back in the '70's) and realize what he was trying to say. I cannot tell you how many ah-ha moments I received from reading those books. Why should I not make that opportunity available to others? That does not mean because I suggest the books that I align or "agree" with his actions or lifestyle!

I can tell you on a personal note that letting go of my judgment has changed my relationships across the board, most significantly with my family. When you let go of your judgment the energy that you put out towards people changes and they respond in kind to you in ways that the mind could not imagine. Now I allow people to be who they are and that leaves room for me to be whoever I am in the moment. In the past for sure I have been sexist, a pathological liar, a fictionalist, and a charlatan as are all people who operate without awareness. Who am I to judge him when I have been guilty of the same?

Nope, that path is no longer for me. Denial is not interesting for me any more, and my personal freedom is worth more to me than the temptation to judge. I prefer to see the "what is" rather than to observe the world through my belief system.

Blessings & love to you on your path, Sheri

Hi Sheri,

Thanks for the audio file of this month. In regards to that, I am in total agreement with what you say about "projecting". The level of our projection is always a by product of our state of consciousness. Now having say that, and as well I agree with you that we have to take responsibility for our feelings caused by a..."judgment", but how do you go in life with out "discernment" which is a more polite way of "judgment"; how to decide what is doing wrong in your life and it needs to be judged and eradicated; how about a politician that is taking advantage of people? How about the things that are not good for us? how do you go ahead with out judging them and then change them or at least recognizing them for a latter fix ? With this I am not saying that every judgment is right to by done, but there are many that are very useful, because once I saved my life because I "judge" somebody and I said to myself to get out of his reach and had not been for that "judgment" me and many others would have been targeted by this person, with very tragic results. How can we be objective in our analysis(...if possible) and take action, with out the help of Judgment or discernment ?? Thank you for your answer !!!

Dear Friend,

Discernment is when you make a choice based on personal preference. You might like a steak rather than fish. But you are not judging steak to be better or worse than fish. Judgment is when you make something right and another thing wrong. My preference is to look at things as uplifting or that they cause suffering. I do my best to stop suffering and to do the best for myself and all involved. But I do not make others wrong or speak badly of politicians that I do not agree with. I do not align with Bush because I do not feel war is necessary. This does not make Bush an idiot. I see him as ignorant of the oneness of all life and so I have compassion for his ignorance. I understand why he is making that choice even if I do not agree with it. But why judge him? That does not change anything. All I can do is vote for someone who I feels aligns with my position as best I can.
When you learn to see what is - you see peoples actions and words for what they are and you take action based on that. You do not have to judge them to take action. If someone was dishonest in business - you see that they conducted themselves in a manner that you would not and that people suffered. So do not do business with them. But why call them a horrible person and disrespect them? Instead we see they are ignorant of the oneness of all life and have compassion for them, and we do not do business with them.

You see? Blessings Sheri

Dear Sheri,

My 15 yrs son came to visit for the holidays - and left yesterday. I had such a hard time letting him go - the emotions were so overwhelming! I don't like it because it hurts. Is it that I'm attached to him like parent and child and should I let it go? Any Suggestions??

Thanks! From a sad Mom!

Dear Mom,

I think it is normal to feel sad when your child leaves your home after a visit - don't you? Of course you are attached to your child. However, the issue is: how long are you in pain for? If it is beyond the day they leave - then that is a problem. First of all - the next day is this new moment - now! And now they are no longer present. If you are living in the now then you are not thinking about yesterday. If you are thinking about yesterday then of course you are going to bring that child into your mind again and then.... start telling yourself a sad story about how you are missing them. That is the second issue. What are you telling yourself when that child comes back in your mind? If each time they enter your mind you are telling a sad story about how they are not in your home, you miss them terribly, you don't get to be with them everyday .....blah, blah... you get the idea. That would make anyone sad!
Ultimately you are in charge of the way you choose to see your life. If you focus on the gratitude of the visit and what you do have - then you will not focus on what you do not have and keep yourself in a lack mentality and suffer.
Does this make sense?

Love, Sheri

Hi Sheri,

I've been thinking about your note. I knew that everything we think controls our emotions. That is why sometimes creating positive stories provides good emotions. Sometimes Its hard to say if its mind or real emotions itself. All I know that Love is real or positive emotions are real.

Dear Sad Mom,

This work is not about avoiding emotions that you do not like. It is about being aware in every moment of what is causing them and being able to make the choice of either seeing what is or seeing according to your story. If you see what is you will be at peace - if you tell a story you will have an emotional response.
If you miss your son that's one thing - if you are a victim of his leaving that is another.

It is hard to transcend your mind if you do not understand it. Again, I will say that emotions do not come of themselves. You must perceive something and judge it to be able to have an emotional reaction. That is why we say "emotional reaction" because it is a reaction to something. To be absolutely clear there are no good and bad emotions! Your judgment makes them good or bad based on the fact that you do not like the way you feel when you are having a fear-based emotional reaction. The key is to stop thinking fear-based thoughts. Love is simply love - it has nothing to do with what you feel is real or not real.

Love, Sheri

Join the forum for community: www.sherirosenthal.com

So what constitutes a doing? Anything you do in a consistent way, without thinking, that reflects you as the personality or program, is a doing. A doing might be the way you interrupt people when they speak, not allowing them to finish what they are saying. Or perhaps the way that you are cutting with your sense of humor, or the way you talk down to people to make yourself look better. When you feel threatened, a doing might be how you use your intelligence to keep people away from you. Even your internal dialogue is a doing. Anything you do that another person can identify as your particular behavior pattern is a doing.

Some of you might be thinking, 'What about my positive doings?' If some of your doings are causing happiness and joy in your life there is no reason to address them right now. But if your doings are sabotaging your life in subtle and not so subtle ways, this definitely deserves immediate attention. In the end, a Warrior will eliminate even his "positive" doings as they are still programmed activities and his ultimate goal is freedom.

Our doings are simply a result of putting ourselves on autopilot and letting our program live our lives for us. For us to discover the remarkable beings that we are, it's necessary for us to stop our doings and the internal dialogue that prompts them. Our thinking is the main support for our seeing the world as we do and for our particular way of interpreting everything that happens to us. The challenge is to force ourselves to see the world differently so that we can experience it differently, and, as a result, create our lives differently. Every time we do something that purposely goes against what we believe or is different from what we normally would do, we expand ourselves and our possibilities exponentially.

The above was reprinted from the book The Complete Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom by Sheri A Rosenthal, DPM

Hi Sheri,

I'm reading your book and have read Don Miguel Ruiz also. I was raised Catholic in an extremely fearful environment. I have recently gone through major life changes and deaths of loved ones. All this has me facing my own mortality and mistakes in my past. Most difficult is that years ago I had an abortion. It was very bad circumstances and I saw the abortion as my only option. The abortion occurred within the first 3 months and was a DNC. I thought I had forgiven myself but I'm losing sleep and my sanity over it and am struggling. The agreement "thou shalt not kill" is one that keeps going over in my head. I respect all living things and feel I am a good person. However, I can't seem to get past this. Can you offer any words of wisdom? Thank You

Dear Concerned,

All of us make many decisions that when we look back at them, cause us great regret and angst. However, no matter what we have done, we cannot change it now and so the only thing we can do is forgive ourselves for taking actions that we might not take right now with the level of consciousness and resources that we have today. Spirit/God gives us free will to be able to take action in life and grow and learn from those actions. As long as you see it for what it is and "repent" for your actions (so to speak as I am using Christian terms here), then that is all you can do. By repent, I mean that you understand that you actions caused suffering and you realize this and do not want to cause suffering again.
God in my experience is not judgmental, nor is God a punishing God. That is something we are taught to scare us. In my experience, God is unconditional love and absolute consciousness, and when we die we merge back into God and into that unconditional love. The rule - thou shalt not kill - is a rule to guide people who do not know better from harming others. When you finally have the experience of God you realize that God is everything and everywhere - and if you kill another you are killing yourself as there is only one entity and we are all part of that entity we call God. I believe that this is why Jesus specifically taught, do not judge lest others judge you, have compassion like your father, and forgive so that you can be forgiven. No one is going to smote you - except those mean thoughts in your own mind. You have paid for your actions many times in your own self-punishment. Forgive yourself and God/Spirit will forgive you too as you are one and the same. You did what you could at that time and the only thing that matters now is how you love others right now in your life and how you love and respect yourself. Surrender that burden and let it go. Forgive and love boldly. God will take good care of you angel.....always.

Love, Sheri

Hello Sheri,

I read your article on Accountability and Responsibility and I have some questions to ask. From my understanding is that we take full responsibility for ourselves, our actions and who and what we manifest into our lives. However, does this mean we need to take full responsibility for everyone and everything that is in this world because ultimately we are all one?
If so, how can one not take things personally if we are all one?
I look forward to your response. Thank you.

Dear Angel,

Not taking anything personally includes even not taking yourself personally. Not taking things personally gives you emotional immunity to the things we do with ignorance in life. It helps us not to judge. The only way you can take something personally is if you judge it to be bad and get mad at yourself or another for it. And taking something personally is just the ego making everything about itself.

We create everything in our reality even as other people are creating us at the same time! So we can only view life from our point of creation. We understand we are not in control of others - yet in a way we are because once we change (we are the action) everything else changes (they are the reaction). The reason this seems like it does not make sense is because we are functioning in a world of seeming duality. But the duality is not truth. Once you deeply experience that you understand that you are a divine being and it is simply the point of view you chose to see from. You can see from both points of view even though they will never reconcile - in this reality.
Does this make sense?
Love, Sheri

Hello Sheri,
I understand what you have explained about taking things personally. However, is this your answer for responsibility also? Is responsibility and not taking things personally the same? I appreciate your insight!

Dear Angel,

No, they are not the same. Not taking anything personally is the outcome of letting go of the ego. Taking responsibility is something the ego does not like to do because it believes in judgement. It feels it will be judged and punished and it does not want that. It will avoid taking responsibility and blame what it can on others. Knowing yourself as god means that you know you are creating your life and why would god blame something on anyone or be a victim of anything? It does not make sense.
Does that help?
Love, Sheri

Dear Sheri,

Absolutely!! Just so I have this clear between the 2: Taking things personally is us judging ourselves and others; our self importance gets in the way of what really is. Responsibility is being accountable for ourselves, actions, thoughts etc and even what we manifest in the world, consciously or unconsciously. However, everyone is on their own path and what they do or not do is their responsibility. It is of utmost importance for us to do our best to become aware of our doings and/or not doings and especially where we come from because we are all one and the same.
Did I get this straight? Thank you.

Dear Angel,

That is much better! We do not take anything personally because truly nothing is about us (other people are god in the process of creating their dream). Yet, we take absolute responsibility for everything we are creating in our reality (from our point of view as us being god manifesting our reality). Both are truth in this world of duality even though there is only one being. We can only view life from our point of view, that is why we word it in this way.
Love, Sheri

Hello Sheri,

Thank you for making this blog a resource for people, as I have been challenged by something I'd like to get your opinion about. You made the following statement on the Amazon.com webpage for your Toltec Wisdom book:

"Are you living in an area that is not supportive of your peace and centeredness, but you're staying because you are too lazy to move or not sure where you would rather go?"

Well my situation is that I'd really like to move out of my area, and be somewhere wooded and green and that has lots of trees. However, my 13-year old daughter is very involved here in her church and several social circles and does not want to move, nor does my 7-yr old daughter. I am a single mother and rely on a lot of support with my kids from my parents, who live less than a mile from me here in Phoenix. So my question was, do you think it's insane for me to continue living here for the sake of my daughters and my parents, rather than move away to a different geographical location, simply because it's "the right" thing to do? At a core level I feel like I would be so selfish to take my kids away from their comfort zone, just because I love the trees. Would you mind sharing your thoughts with me?

In gratitude and love


Dear Frustrated,

Thank you for the note. Every action we take in life has consequences. If we have the insight to see what those outcomes might be we can decide if we want those outcomes.
Have you decided where you would like to live? Have you gone there with the children? Have you engaged them in the process? Truthfully no child wants to move. So asking them would be a useless endeavor. However - it does not sound like you have done any work to see where you want to be or even to investigate if it would be possible.
Most people use their dreams to punish themselves because they just keep thinking about them rather than taking action on them. Start taking action and see what happens along the way. You will receive clues as to whether or not this is best for you. If everything moves effortlessly and you find a great place with a fabulous church (that you take the kids to during a visit so that they can make some friends) and they find it fun and you find a supportive situation (like perhaps people to watch the kids) and a job - then you will see that things are unfolding for you.
Your limiting thoughts are the biggest problem you have right now. Anything is possible, you must take action so that you can see if what you are thinking is actually what your heart wants - that is important. Many times the mind makes all kinds of proposals because the grass always seems better on the other side, but then once you start researching you may find that there are things about those places that you do not enjoy. But you would never have known that if you did not proceed. I encourage you to take action so that you can get answers rather than sitting around thinking and thinking.
If you do that you will never be happy because you will always be wondering what if?

Blessings, Sheri

Hello Sheri,

I had a Toltec teacher for a while. He used to say that it didn't matter what a person wanted only what a person needed. My understanding is that when a person wants it's because of an ego attachment and what a person needs the must have in order to grow. Is this part of the Toltec philosophy or was this his?
The reason I'm asking is that I'm in a program for another coaching certification. They have a distinction of need vs. want. They say that its ok to want that this is what keeps us motivated and when we have a need there is an attachment and it prevents us from having whatever we think we need.
I would appreciate your feedback on this. Thank you!

Dear Friend,

In general coaching addresses the ego-mind on the level of the ego mind. So they would have a different point of view of course. For us, we do not need to be motivated by our minds because we have worked to transcend our mind and all the fear-based beliefs it contains. True motivation comes from life moving through us. You could say the "will of god" is for all entities to create - and so my motivation comes from that. It does not matter what I do as long as I am creating. To me, trying to motivate people when they are filled with self-sabotaging beliefs and self-hate is not productive in the end. Yes, you can make many improvements in people's lives, but there is another level of conscious creation above that.
Want is from the ego. Need is food, shelter, water and rest. Without those things you will die. Everything else is ego.

Love, Sheri

www.sherirosenthal.com

Dear Sheri,

Thank you for your weekly audios! It is such fun when something hits you up along side of your head and allows you to see more clearly! For whatever reason, guess I was just ripe and your words resonated, your audio regarding judging and projecting helped me to see what I have been doing at a deeper and clearer level. I knew that I was still creating much of my reality from fears even though I have been working to incorporate the wise Toltec teachings into my life for several years now. When I listened to your audio, it was just so clear for the very first time that I am judging my husband and taking the most minor things ever so personally. In my mind I have denied that I judged him! I knew that I was taking things personally, but I never had been able to see it so clearly as originating from that moment of judgment!!

It seems that now that I can see how I am judging him, that perhaps I am ready to see how I am also judging myself. Can you give me some pointers as to how to detect when one judges oneself? I have been able to stop many of my emotional charges now that I see what I am doing at that moment of making a judgment and it has given me many lighter days!! I am setting my intent every day not to judge my husband! When I do have an emotional charge and put the reaction out there, it will bring on a sleepless few hours in the middle of the night. That, I suppose, is a self judgment...not being able to accept my own mistakes as I see it very clearly after projecting, but then it is of course too late to take it back.

I truly feel ready to stop adding any suffering to this planet, this marriage, but perhaps one needs to stop judging oneself before being able to truly stop judging others. Any clarity is very much appreciated.

Love and light!

Dear Friend,

What a fantastic realization! This is the easiest way to spot judgment: pay particular attention to your feelings. As soon as you lose your center and have an emotional reaction - you are judging. My favorite is to complete this sentence (taken from my books).

I feel ____what emotion?_______because I believe_________what?____.

And example would be: I feel humiliated because I believe that my girlfriend told all my girlfriends that I looked terrible in the new dress I wore to Cindy's party. In this case we can see that the fear-based emotional reaction of humiliation was caused by the linking of ones self-worth to what others think about us. You can see the self-judgment based on how others judge us.

Once you get the hang of this it will happen automatically in your mind and you will start to see right away what your issue is. Remember - there is nothing out there to upset us - we upset ourselves with what we tell ourselves about what's happening out there.

Love, Sheri

www.sherirosenthal.com/weekly_audio/audio.html

The inventory is an important part of Stalking. It's like a complete download of all our beliefs and agreements. Once we know what's in our minds, we can choose what's working for us and what's not. Then we can re-program ourselves to behave calmly, with kindness, compassion, and love. We will not be driven to create life in ways that sabotage ourselves, or that set ourselves up to fail or to be hurt by others. This is because we will no longer be possessed by all those agreements we made when we were young, which have caused us to see the world in such a distorted way. Since we are only in control of what we do or think, it would be more accurate to say that this is mastery of our own mind, rather than the mind being the master of us! (Now that's a switch worth looking forward to.) When a Warrior has taken a complete inventory of her mind, she is in a position of to seeing the non-truth of her human concepts. Then she can make the choice to either continue to be attached to what she believes, investing her personal power in maintaining that illusionary structure, or she can detach from it totally and be free. In life we are always adding information to our inventory. The mind is a very fragile entity, and in order to keep itself safe and intact it carefully chooses which things to add to the inventory and which things to ditch. If someone says something to us that does not match what we believe, we discard it. If the information fits into our inventory, we agree with it and download it into our program. We have all had the experience of someone trying to put something into our inventory that we don't agree with. This immediately upsets us and we start defending our point of view and rejecting the other person'stheirs. Their information is shaking the foundation of our inventory, and that is very frightening to the mind. To be free, a Warrior slowly and gently adds truth and love-based information to his inventory (which can be quite contrary to what is currently in his program). This acts as a "good" virus, transforming his programming and breaking his fixation on his own mind without upsetting the mind too much. The key is to break the inventory without hurting our mind or losing our marbles.

Hi Sheri,

About a year ago I chose to step back from a relationship with my sister. I found that over the years I was less and less able to deal with my reactions to her. I was taking things more and more personally and was allowing the circumstances to cause me to dislike being around her. The more I reacted to her judgments not only of me but of seemingly everything, the more miserable I became. The proverbial straw came just before my last birthday and I literally "ran away". I took myself to Mexico for my birthday and my greatest companion ended up being the "Four Agreements".

Anyway, my question for you is "what now?" I have made attempts to be in contact and have even sat down to a family dinner with her there but she has indicated she is not interested in having any part of me. Her daughter invited me to her wedding but my sister requested I not come is an example. I hear from family that she continues to speak very ill of me and sometimes I still hurt over it. Most of the time I am able to realize that it is her poison that is directed at me and not take it personally. I can only return love and compassion and wishing her the gift of awareness so she can wake up from her nightmare. Of course this is done in my quiet time and not in person. Is this all I can do unless she wakes from her dream?

I journeyed to Teotihuacan earlier this year and at the Place of the Women I acknowledged my sisterhood with her and sent forth love. I do miss her somewhat but is this a situation that must be what it is and maybe improve over time? If she dies suddenly what will I feel then? Obviously this is bothering me but I viewed the relationship as being an abusive one for many many years and learned to love myself enough to remove myself from it. As family, should we view this situation differently?

A Sister in Distress!

Dear Sister,

This is a big question for one email angel!
To be very brief, it is imperative that you forgive her completely and change you story about your past totally. As long as you hold any resentment or judgment about her behavior it is not likely to change. I am going to guess that to what I just wrote that you would say you have forgiven her. But that is not my observation based on what you have written and the words that you have used. You still feel guilt about your part in the situation or else you would not think you would feel bad if something happened to her before resolution occurred between you both.
I suggest you go to the wedding and have fun - give her a big hug if you can and just behave lovingly. Perhaps you can look at why she is mad and apologize for your half of the situation (there is never one side) and write a beautiful letter to her. But I warn you - as long as you hold that she abused you and that she was mean, etc - don't bother. Because that means you have not forgiven her yet as you are still in judgment of her and have not taken responsibility for allowing that situation to occur and for your part in that drama. After all, no one can abuse you unless you feel you deserve it and if you help co-create it.
I know this might be a bit tough to swallow - but it is a start. Love, Sheri

Dear Sheri,

The wedding happened months ago, I RSVP'd to my niece that I would attend but was emailed by my sister asking me not to come. I sort of honored her wishes, I was not at the wedding but on the beach where it occurred watching from afar and sending my love. No one knows.

Around Christmas time I sent her a card and I emailed her about my involvement with Toltec Wisdom and what I was doing in the way of self exploration. I went on to explain that the reason I pulled back from our relationship was because I was becoming aware how reactive I was becoming and needed to explore it. Yes, I did feel I was being abused and I did help create it by taking it personally and judging her. I hope I have forgiven her completely but I work on it knowing it is necessary. Thank you for reminding me what an important ingredient this is.

I do feel guilt in my part because I feel I should have been able to deal with the whole situation differently. I was always a sounding board for my sister and lent a sympathetic ear in all the drama in her life. It is huge. I know she depended on me to be there but I was exhausted with it all. So, I not only judged her I was judging myself more and more until it ended up with me ending the interaction. So, now I have me to forgive as well. I have a great amount of love for me so will try to continue to love me unconditionally. And her.

Anyway I took your advice and wrote her a letter:
Hi my sister,

I hope this email finds you well. I have been working on changing the story of my past so I can enjoy living in today. It is very hard work and I can only say I am doing my best at any given moment. My best is what is here right now at this moment. I still feel guilt at my part in this situation and am working on forgiving myself and forgiving you as well. I apologize for my half of our situation (there is never just one side) and hope you will accept that apology.

I am learning to love myself unconditionally and not to judge or criticize myself as I am in the process of being more aware of why I react as I do. I try to do my best and forgive myself for thinking I could always do better. I am working toward that unconditional love for everyone in my life as well as humans in general. When anyone throws what I perceive to be a barb at me I will do my best to not take it personally and love them unconditionally. This is my goal. I love you sister and hope that someday we can enjoy each others company.

Dear Sister,

That is a lovely letter and hopefully she will feel your energy and intent in it - but if not - the key is to detach and know that you did your best in this moment to heal things.
Love, Sheri

www.withforgiveness.com

Hi Sheri,

I would really appreciate any guidance you could offer for a more pressing situation. I have 10 more days of waiting for biopsy results of a sore on the back of my hand. The dermatologist said that it is either basal or early squamous cell. I know that many people deal gracefully with much worse news and I have the capacity to handle this better. I'm consciously thinking positively, using the Law of Attraction, and any thing else that crosses my mind. Despite my attempts to use all the techniques that I have learned over the years, my subconscious is not cooperating. I can't sleep at night and I'm having trouble getting day to day things done. I am trying to take care of business and anticipate and prepare for whatever might happen. Like, in the worst case, I may not be able to write with my right hand for awhile, so I should complete my sabbatical report and other writings immediately. But I can't focus for long. I feel very responsible for this situation. I hit the back of my hand on something about ten years ago and I watched this sore get better and then worse when exposed to sun. This summer the sore got worse and didn't rebound as well. Not taking care of this was a very unloving and foolish way to behave towards myself. I am a nurse and I know better. I feel like an idiot. Yes, I know that calling myself names is just more self abuse. Beyond the guilt, I guess I am anxious and worried, I want to be calm and self loving, but I am not doing such a good job.

I would really appreciate any Toltec or other wisdom you could offer.

Dear Friend,

Why use your memory to abuse yourself? That is more unloving then the sad story you created about what happened to your wound. Anyway it is finished and the past is over. either you live then or live now. You normally allow your mind to run the show - now it is time to stop that. So what if it is skin cancer? You will have it operated on and then it will be fine. Be grateful you found out so that you could treat it. Once you have one "bad" thought - why have that same thought again and again so that you cannot sleep? You heard the thought - so do you need to hear it again? You already know it. It is like being around someone who is repeating themselves over and over again. If someone was doing that you would refuse to listen. But with your own thoughts you listen again and again. Are you that interesting?
I know my mind is not that interesting when it does that!

Love, Sheri

The Toltec saw the ability to shift levels of awareness as an amazing aspect of our magical abilities. What we choose to focus our attention on will determine what kind of world we assemble for ourselves Whenever we focus our attention with our eyes, we assemble our normal world of the Tonal. When we focus our attention using our Nagual, our assemblage moves and we start to assemble the world of the Nagual. How far we shift from one point of view to the other determines what we see. That is why having control over our attention is so important, we use it to determine what reality we choose to perceive.

Let's look for a moment at how we use our attention in our normal world of the Tonal. The ancient Toltecs observed that when a person's attention was focused on something enjoyable, the person was happy, but if his or her attention was focused on something unpleasant, the person would be unhappy. So where do you think our attention would be best focused? I think this is a no-brainer; obviously we would want to train our attention to focus on the beauty of life.

Whenever we find ourselves feeling like things are unfair in life and we're the victim of circumstances, then we'll be unhappy. This is because our attention is on what we believe about life instead of on life itself. If we can change our limiting beliefs about life, we will no longer create suffering, disappointment, and heartbreak in our reality. By simply getting control of our attention and choosing to focus it in a different way, our assemblage point shifts and we can change our entire reality and the way we see life. And that, my friends, is real Toltec sorcery and magic in the most practical of ways!

The above was reprinted from the book The Complete Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom by Sheri A Rosenthal, DPM

Dear Sheri,

I need to know if there is a toltec view of what forbearance means. Do you have a definition of it? Thanks.

Dear Friend,

This is a great question. Thanks for your note. Forbearance is something that is present in all spiritual traditions. The ego is always involved in acts of self-importance and one of the best ways for challenging the ego is with the practice of forbearance. We could say forbearance is a refraining from something or having tolerance, patience and/or restraint in the face of provocation. A warrior cannot be provoked because he/she does not take anything personally. A warrior always practices forbearance as a way of gaining clarity and perspective. When we want to jump in and do or say something we are reacting to life rather than taking action from clarity.
Does this help?

Blessings, Sheri

Dear Sheri,

How do you see the Toltec wisdom interfacing with "traditional" Western religion? Can the Toltec precepts coexist with Judaism, for example? Each and every day I feel more like the quote in your book by Hafiz: "I have learned so much from God that I no longer call myself a Christian, a Hindu, a Muslim, a Buddhist, a Jew." However, I don't feel comfortable distancing myself completely from the Jewish roots/culture in which I was raised. I realize that the goal is to live totally in the present and to be free of my past (and I have let go of a lot), yet I can't help but honor the elegant and beautiful code of Jewish ethics that are so fair. I have found these ethics to promote kindness, generosity, thoughtfulness and gentleness in our dealings with other humans, other creatures and the earth herself. Can you help me put these two contexts together, as they both resonate deeply with me. Do you get this kind of question often?

From LC in CA

Dear Angel,

What a great question! I still participate in the holidays with my family when I am around. However I understand that it's the ultimate result that the religion is taking me to that is important, not the religion itself (enlightenment). I go because my family likes it and it is respectful to my parents. As for me, I can connect to source anytime and do not need a rabbi/priest/minister who may not have had the experience I have had, tell me what that is like! But I can respect his/her point of view, teachings and wisdom and enjoy myself in their presence.

In the end we must transcend concepts to reach that place. Any religion is a concept - including Toltec which in the end means nothing. Toltec is no better or worse than anything else. Religions are guideposts and attachment to them will prevent you from being free. That is why we say "believe without believing". And that goes for what ever tradition we are studying.

Blessings & love, Sheri

Although Toltec is not a religion, it could be referred to as a spiritual path, as it is concerned with the expression of the creative and spiritual self. As such, it recognizes all spiritual teachers and religious philosophies. The Toltec tradition looks to find commonality between all these traditions, religions, and philosophies; it seeks the truth behind the myths and dogma. What's most important is to see and acknowledge the sameness of religions and traditions rather than the perceived differences, since difference creates separation between people, and commonality creates oneness. We could say that the origin of all religious teaching comes from humanity's desire to express our feeling or experience that there is something overwhelmingly immense out there, whatever that may be and whatever language we may use to describe that. Modern Toltecs use the word the Infinite to describe this phenomenon, but there are literally thousands of words from different traditions and religions that represent the concept of a higher power or consciousness: Spirit, God, cosmic consciousness, divine being, Allah, Krishna, Buddha, Christ, Mohammed, higher self, the light, love, and so on. The Infinite represents that which is boundless beyond time or space, without beginning or end, absolute, and omnipotent. It is also the part of you that is manifest in this reality, yet is eternal. It is life itself. ....An excerpt from The Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom

Imagine for a moment that you are listening to the radio and singing a song. When the next song comes on you immediately start singing that new song don't you? Do you think you would be capable of singing that first song all day long while other songs keep changing and playing throughout the day? It is difficult to do that; I cannot sing one song while another one is playing..I get too confused! Yet that is how life is. The songs keep changing and you are still singing some old song from hours or days ago! No wonder life is difficult and your head is spinning!

"What is causing people the most stress in the New Year? A recent survey by the American Psychological Association said the following issues are the top vote getters: - 63% of those surveyed said money issues; - 44% said national security; and - 31% said job security. Younger Americans were more worried about money (74%) and national security (40%) than those over 35. Many of us include getting a handle on stress as part of our New Years resolutions, and the survey also shows the most popular things we do to deal with our worries: - One-third of us either eat (22%) or drink alcohol (14%) to cope with stress; - Others rely on exercise (45%) and religious and spiritual activities (44%); - 14% turn to massage and yoga to relieve stress. If you've resolved to get a handle on stress in the new year, psychologists offer this bit of advice: The quickest fixes are rarely the best fixes. In fact, they can sometimes cause more harm than good. While people tend to reduce stress in familiar ways they've learned over time, those ways may not be good for their health. In fact, these healthier behaviors can have added effects and be longer lasting when trying to deal with stress and build resilience: - Make connections - Good relationships with family and friends are important. Make an attempt to reconnect with people. Accepting help and support from those who care about you can help alleviate stress. - Set realistic goals -Take small concrete steps to deal with tasks instead of overwhelming yourself with goals that are too far-reaching for busy times. - Keep things in perspective - Try to consider stressful situations in a broader context and keep a long-term perspective. Avoid blowing events out of proportion. - Take decisive actions - Instead of letting stressors get the best of you, make a decision to address the underlying cause of a stressful situation. - Take care of yourself - Pay attention to your own needs and feelings. Engage in activities that you enjoy and find relaxing. Taking care of yourself helps keep your mind and body primed to deal with stressful situations." This article was taken from the American Psychological Association's help centers website at http://helping.apa.org/

by Miyamoto Musashi

The Book of Five Rings is one of the most insightful texts on the subtle arts of confrontation and victory to emerge from Asian culture. Written not only for martial artists but for anyone who wants to apply the timeless principles of this text to their life, the book analyzes the process of struggle and mastery over conflict that underlies every level of human interaction.
The Book of Five Rings was composed in 1643 by the famed duelist and undefeated samurai Miyamoto Musashi. Thomas Cleary’s translation is immediately accessible, with an introduction that presents the spiritual background of the warrior tradition. Along with Musashi’s text, Cleary translates here another important Japanese classic on leadership and strategy, The Book of Family Traditions on the Art of War by Yagyu Munenori, which highlights the ethical and spiritual insights of Taoism and Zen as they apply to the way of the warrior.


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by Shunryu Suzuki -- an interesting read.

A respected Zen master in Japan and founder of the San Francisco Zen Center, Shunryu Suzuki has blazed a path in American Buddhism like few others. He is the master who climbs down from the pages of the koan books and answers your questions face to face. If not face to face, you can at least find the answers as recorded in Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind, a transcription of juicy excerpts from his lectures. From diverse topics such as transience of the world, sudden enlightenment, and the nuts and bolts of meditation, Suzuki always returns to the idea of beginner's mind, a recognition that our original nature is our true nature. With beginner's mind, we dedicate ourselves to sincere practice, without the thought of gaining anything special. Day to day life becomes our Zen training, and we discover that "to study Buddhism is to study ourselves." And to know our true selves is to be enlightened. --Brian Bruya

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by Kahlil Gibran -- and a book worth having on your shelf -- certainly a classic

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The surprise indie hit film "What the Bleep Do We Know?" tackles some of life's biggest questions, without really answering them: Where have we been? Why are we here? Where are we going? Part documentary, part feature, it's a quirky film that draws parallels between the mysteries of quantum physics -- a mind-expanding field whose findings suggest many so-called laws of science are a lot less ironclad than we once thought -- and some of humankind's most vexing spiritual queries. The film weaves together sound bites from a series of mostly academic thinkers commenting on life's grand themes, with an occasionally loopy narrative starring actress Marlee Matlin. Depending on your point of view, it's either very deep stuff or too New Age for its own good. What's clear is that "What the Bleep ...?" which made more than $10 million even before its recent release on DVD, has struck a nerve. Recently, I spoke with Fred Alan Wolf, a tousle-haired physicist who is one of the film's most animated voices. Wolf has written numerous books, including "Taking the Quantum Leap" which won a National Book Award, and "The Spiritual Universe." His work often deals with the intersection between science and spirituality.


Did the popularity of "What the Bleep Do We Know?" surprise you, given that the subject matter -- quantum physics, neurobiology, the nature of reality -- is kind of heady? Sure, it both surprised and delighted me. But I sensed pretty early on that it would strike a nerve. When the film opened in Portland[, Ore.], I was there to answer questions from the audience, and I could tell that these were the type of people who are the true silent majority in this country. America today isn't in the religious Right -- even though there are millions of people in that movement. It isn't in the antireligious Left, either. It's in the center, and I think those are the people who caught on to the film. What do you think made it so appealing to them? Well, the spiritual experience is really what people hunger for, and I think the film addressed that hunger. People came away from it with that exaltation or excitement that comes when you have a spiritual awakening. Movies can sometimes provide that kind of opening in people, and this one did that. These days, conflicts over religious and moral questions are grabbing headlines on a daily basis. I wonder if you think we're moving closer to spiritual ideas and values as a society, or further away? I was born in 1934, so I've seen lots of phases come and go -- certainly during the '60s, I thought we were going in the right direction, but that turned into being a great big drugfest. And then we had this rebirth of -- I don't know what you want to call it -- a red-white-and-bluism that I thought we had gotten rid of before. It's blind patriotism, which seems to have sided with an extreme right wing of religious practitioners. But I think that's fading now. I think that's not going to hold. Do you really think the religious Right is fading in this country? I mean, you could argue that it has more influence today than it's ever had. Well, maybe fading is the wrong word. Let's say it's come to what might be called the peak of its curve. I think we're now moving into another kind of direction. There is a new spirituality that I think you're seeing. I think the film has indicated that to us. I mean, it's kind of a spirituality that unites rather than separates. Did you grow up with a particular religious bent? Not really. I was born of Jewish parents, and they -- being first-generation Americans themselves -- weren't very religious. That said, you consider yourself a spiritual person. So, what's the difference, in your view, between spirituality and religion? The way I see it, religion is a kind of a vessel that hopes to hold a spiritual elixir, but mostly it's just an empty vial. And most people who practice religion don't get out of it what their religion is supposed to do for them, which is to invoke or enliven the spiritual experience. What do you consider a spiritual experience? Anytime you have a kind of "aha!" moment, where you feel a sudden lightening bolt of enlightenment. I've had many such awakenings. A lot of them have happened while I've been traveling in other parts of the world. Once, when I was at a Buddhist temple in India, I had a spiritual awakening -- believe it or not -- when a fly landed on my foot. You might say, "My God, what kind of an awakening can that be?" Well, it was profound. What happened? Well, I was in the temple, and the Buddhists were chanting. Then, suddenly, this fly landed on my foot. I felt as if my consciousness and the fly's consciousness had become one consciousness. When I looked down to see where the Buddhists were chanting, it was like looking through an infinity mirror. I saw an infinity of Buddhist monks going back all the way to the beginning of time. It all happened in a flash, and it was very moving to me. You don't hear many scientists talking about such things. When you tell your colleagues a story like that, do they ever look at you like you're crazy? No, they don't, because usually they have no idea of what I'm talking about. [Laughs.] Actually, there are a number of really good scientists out there who have had these kinds of experiences but will not talk about them -- they like to keep their science in one pocket and their spiritual beliefs in a whole other pocket. Do you think it's possible to bridge that gap between science and spirituality? Well, let's put it this way -- they're not going to just come together and be one. Nobody's going to get a degree in quantum Christianity or something like that. But I think a dialogue, a meaningful dialogue, will take place. These dialogues happened in ancient times. I mean, there was no separation then between philosophy, religion and spirituality. The Greeks talked about earth, air, fire and water. And they also talked about a quintessence ["fifth essence"], which they called physis, which was the spiritual aspect of it all, from which the word physics even comes. So it seems to me that in our present state of consciousness, that kind of bridge could be made, and be fairly firm. How do you get scientists thinking seriously about spirituality? Many scientists have their first spiritual awakening when somebody close to them dies. Then, suddenly, they realize what life is about, and they begin to see the illusion of "I'm going to live forever." Once that happens, you begin to open your mind to the possibility that your head may be full of demons when you think all that's out there is a godless universe of law and chaos. How about you? Do you think about death much? I've been thinking about it for a long time. I lost a son at the age of 25, and that had mystical implications for me. I also lost my father when I was 23. I lost my mother about 25 years ago. So I've had a number of deaths, and a number of -- let's call it "visits" of certain kinds, of a spiritual quality that also were important to me and instructive to me, and heartening for me. What do you think happens when we die? Well, as far as I know -- as far as I can tell, there is a return to what I call "the Big Elephant." It's a funny thing -- spirituality is like an elephant in the room, a huge thing that nobody can see. The elephant is your spiritual essence, your essential self. That's different from your ego self, or the person you identify with in body/mind consciousness. This other form of consciousness may actually be running the show, and we have no idea who or what it is. What do you think it is? Well, I come to this understanding not only through my spiritual qualities or experiences but also through quantum physics itself, because in quantum physics, we have this wonderful fact of life that says, "Observation of reality is very different than things just interacting with each other to make reality." In other words, it isn't just a question of consciousness arising from particles banging into each other in your brain or something like that -- which is the way many scientists tend to look at it -- but it's more like how physicists picture it in quantum physics. The picture shows that what we imagine to be particles bang into each other and give rise to waves of possibilities, such as where and when these particles will appear. These waves don't become real until a conscious observation occurs. Somehow, when you consciously observe a possibility, it becomes real and "out there." And the evidence seems to be pointing, as far as I can tell, to the conclusion that there is only one true observer in this whole universe. And what death seems to be is a return to that one observer -- whether you want to call that God, or you want to call it the soul of the universe, or just the Big Kahuna, I don't care. But that's what seems to happen. Do you ever pray? Do you ever try to connect with this observer that you're talking about? Only at times of extreme stress, like when my father was dying, I think I prayed. But other than that, I don't pray. I know that may seem terrible, but I just don't. A long time ago, when I began this career of doing what I'm doing right now -- of writing books and getting out of my normal routine, which was a professor of physics at San Diego State University, I kind of said, "I surrender to the powers that be. Use me. I'm here to be used. I'll do whatever guides me into that." I just did that. And that was my last -- if you want to -- prayer. In my way of thinking, God is always present in me. And it's not a question if I have to pray to somebody out there. He knows what's going on, or she knows what's going on, or it knows what's going on. Do you have any spiritual practice that you do? The only practice I have is the everyday, every-moment act of honoring the spiritual in everybody I meet, in everything I meet; I call it "living in the mystery of now" -- just enjoying the moment as it is right now, regardless of what is in store for me, or what's happening to me. I practice it with all my friends and all my relationships. I certainly practice it in my marriage. My marriage is very sacred to me, and I try to honor my wife and the spirit in her. And that's what makes our union a blessed one, because we both have that intention. It's not that we're walking around on eggshells around each other. No, no, we scream and yell like everybody else. But there's an inherent understanding that's deep within us. So, what are you working on these days? Right now, I'm interested in heaven and hell. How do these ideas arise? And is there something in our quantum physical observation of reality that would make such imagery arise? And I think there is, so now I'm working out the details of that. That sounds interesting. Can you say more? You know, there are people that walk around believing that whatever religious belief they have, it's the truth. And what I've learned from science, and from my own investigation of the spiritual belief systems I've seen around the world, is there's no such thing as "the" truth. There are many different truths, and [one or some] appear to a believer as "the" truth, while the other truths appear as lies. And that, unfortunately, is what breeds a kind of malcontent, and a false, God-like holding onto things, and leads to -- you guessed it -- heaven and hell.



During his far-flung career in journalism, Bay Area writer and editor David Ian Miller has worked as a city hall reporter, personal finance writer, cable television executive and managing editor of a technology news site. His writing credits include Salon.com, Wired News and The New York Observer.

Studies show that those who regularly attend houses of worship live longer and healthier lives. This story and more on our newly updated Health and Healing center. more...

When I was a kid, I had no clear idea of what the Holy Ghost was for. He seemed boring and dowdy, a leftover appendage to the Trinity. Maybe it was because the Holy Ghost was described as the Love between the Father and Son. Love is great, but it isn't a Pers more...

You may not know it, but you're a Jedi--at least according to the dozens of Beliefnet members who compare their own faiths to the spirituality of "Star Wars." Find out what the Force has in common with your faith. more...

"Toltecs understand that they don't know anything about anything. They realize that what they know is just an interpretation of what they perceive and that this interpretation is created using abstract concepts. Concepts represent a description of an experience, and there can be hundreds of them for any particular issue or situation. In the end, we can see that our concepts can only represent a point of view about our experience, but not the experience itself; therefore, a concept can't be the truth. The whole truth must be inclusive of all points of view." .....A quote from "The Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom"

The Warrior is a person who is fighting for freedom from his or her own domestication and social conditioning. A Warrior seeks freedom to be able to move through his or her life without having to link one's self-worth to the beliefs, thoughts, and wishes of one's fellow man. Along with that comes the freedom to be happy no matter what happens in life. ....An excerpt from "The Idiots Guide to Toltec Wisdom"

"The world we create as a result of focusing our attention for the first time in our lives (through the process of domestication and programming) is this world, the Tonal. Hence, we also call it the reality of the first attention. When we take the time to heal our wounds, and let go of our beliefs and concepts, we detach from the fixation we have upon the Tonal. In doing this, we create the world of the second attention, so named because we focus our attention for the second time (and move our assemblage point) in a new and totally different way to create another reality we have never perceived before. We become seers with the freedom to view the world as it is and without projecting what we think we know upon it. In this way we have the ability to assemble the Nagual's world, where anything and everything is possible. Warriors understand that our use of the first attention puts order into a chaotic universe; it creates the world of the Tonal. The key is to realize that this order only represents a point of view and is not necessarily the absolute truth. The second attention is when we focus our attention on what is, rather than what we were taught about reality. It involves a shift of our assemblage point and state of consciousness into heightened awareness." .....As quoted from The Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom

The key to forgiveness is to forgive from the heart not from the mind. Knowing in your rational mind that your parents did the best they could to raise you is not enough to constitute forgiveness. That is why every time you are with your Dad you still argue. If you really forgave him you would not be reacting that way. You would have compassion for his dream and understand that he is just expressing his point of view. If you truly let go of the pain of your childhood, your self importance and your point of view, you would not be taking him personally any more. And it would not be necessary to punish him by behaving like an angry child. It behooves us to look at ourselves with honesty and objectivity. You can say you have forgiven someone in your life, but the proof is in the pudding..so to speak. If you have an emotional reaction in the presence of someone, that is your hearts' way of telling you that you have not resolved your issues with them. In other words you have not truly forgiven that person. Begin by ceasing to lie to yourself and by stopping the stories you create about why you behave the way you do. Stop blaming your behavior on other people and take responsibility for your emotional reactions. If you could forgive all the people in your life who have hurt or wounded you it would be possible to be in control of your behavior instead of being in reaction all the time. Imagine living life not experiencing a constant emotional rollercoaster of pain, anger and jealousy! That would be bliss!

"Internal dialogue is the conversation that constantly is taking place within our own mind which we call thinking. It hooks our attention with a non-stop litany of the contents of our program and the totality of our beliefs and concepts. We maintain our view of the world and our personal point of view with our internal dialogue. Inner silence is absolute quietude of the mind and is the result of detaching our attention from the internal dialogue. It is the gateway to the second attention and the Infinite (the Nagual)." ....As quoted from The Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom

"Human beings are perceivers, but the world that they perceive is an illusion: an illusion created by the description that was told to them from the moment they were born." Carlos Castaneda, from Tales of Power as quoted in The Wheel of Time

You will often hear don Miguel saying that our emotions are the key to our personal freedom. This is a very wise piece of information. I work with many people personally and the thing I observe the most is how often folks want to totally ignore what they are feeling throughout their day. When I ask them how they are and what is going on, they say things are good. Yet when you ask them if they got upset today they will say well yes, this morning with their husband, then later when the dishwasher repair man came to the house and then later at work when something was not typed correctly by the secretary. So what is going on here? Why are we ignoring the most important tool that we have for our personal growth? What this tells me is that opportunity after opportunity is happening for you all day long and you are too asleep to see them. If you do not acknowledge every time you have a fear based emotional reaction, you will allow your personal power and happiness drain away from you without even knowing it! And more than that you will be missing the chances that spirit is giving you to grow and change. We can only shift and change within the context of our challenges..not by reading books and attending workshops. Yes you will have ah-ha's and you will learn tools and techniques, get to meet new friends and learn perhaps a better belief system than the one you have now. But the bottom line is the action you take in your life to make those insights become practical applications. A warrior lives by the challenge. That means a warrior perceives everything as an opportunity to learn, even by observing the way they talk to themselves when they are waiting on line in the grocery or sitting on the toilet with constipation. Who cares where the opportunity comes from, a challenge is a challenge! You can learn as much from the way you victimize yourself on the toilet when you are constipated as you can during an argument with your partner. The point is to take advantage of all that life is gifting you with in every moment. Stop throwing way these events in your non-awareness. If you start seeing these happenings as an opportunity to get out of your hell, have clarity and grow rather than as "s-t happens" your life will turn around totally. Take a moment right now to think about how you perceive the events of your life. Do you see the challenges in your life as inconveniences? If you do this could be a great time to shift that since it is just a choice as to the way we chose to perceive our lives. Remember..everything is just a point of view! There is one thing I know for sure about this reality. "S-t" never happens; let's break that belief right now together. Life occurs and life works on the basis of action-reaction. Take action from clarity rather than your programmed reactions and you will be on your way to joyful emotions rather than fear based ones. With all my love & blessings. Sheri

"Now I know that you recieve from the world what you give to the world. I understand it from physics as the third law of motion: For every action, there's an equal and opposite reation. It is the essence of what Eastern philosophers call karma. In "The Color Purple", the character Celie explained it to Mister: "Everything you try to do to me, already done to you." Your actions revolve around you as surely as the earth revolves around the sun. The more conscious I became of this, the more quickly my actions came back. Today I try to do well and be well with everyone I reach or encounter. I make sure to use my life for that whcih can be of good wil. Yes, this has brought me great wealth. More important, it has fortified me spiritually and emotionally. When people say they are looking for happiness, I ask, "What are you giving to the world?" I'll never forget this couple who appreared on my show. The wife couldn't understand why their relationship had broken down. She kept syaing, "He used to make me so happy. He doesn't make me happy anymore." What she couldn't see was that she was the cause of her own effect. Happiness is never something you get from other people. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you are able to give. If you think something is missing in your lifeor you're not getting what you deserve, remember that there's no Yellow Brick Road. You lead life; it doesn't lead you." ....An excerpt from O magazine

Although Toltec is not a religion, it could be referred to as a spiritual path, as it is concerned with the expression of the creative and spiritual self. As such, it recognizes all spiritual teachers and religious philosophies. The Toltec tradition looks to find commonality between all these traditions, religions, and philosophies; it seeks the truth behind the myths and dogma. What's most important is to see and acknowledge the sameness of religions and traditions rather than the perceived differences, since difference creates separation between people, and commonality creates oneness. We could say that the origin of all religious teaching comes from humanity's desire to express our feeling or experience that there is something overwhelmingly immense out there, whatever that may be and whatever language we may use to describe that. Modern Toltecs use the word the Infinite to describe this phenomenon, but there are literally thousands of words from different traditions and religions that represent the concept of a higher power or consciousness: Spirit, God, cosmic consciousness, divine being, Allah, Krishna, Buddha, Christ, Mohammed, higher self, the light, love, and so on. The Infinite represents that which is boundless beyond time or space, without beginning or end, absolute, and omnipotent. It is also the part of you that is manifest in this reality, yet is eternal. It is life itself. ....An excerpt from The Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom

One of the most challenging aspects of ones spiritual path is learning to open ones heart totally and absolutely. For most of us, we give our love solely to those people who we deem worthy of our love, who we feel we owe love to, or, those whom we feel are appropriate to love. The operative words here are: deem worthy, owe, and appropriate. Love is not conditional. If we want to open our hearts it means that we must let go of all the conditions that we hold so dearly to, like those in the above paragraph. I know it is challenging to give our love to our family and our beloved when we hold so many resentments and petty angers toward them. That is why forgiveness becomes such a key factor in our spiritual path. Through forgiveness we can let go of our desire to manipulate and punish those we care for the most using our love. The more love you put out the more your level of consciousness will shift. When you exude love, you become so high, it feels like bliss. Experiencing the state of enlightenment, to be light perceiving light, involves an opening of the heart that exceeds that which the rational mind thinks is physically possible. Sheri Rosenthal DPM


sherirosenthal.com
Originally Posted on 5/11/2005 8:23:03 PM
Content source: Manual Entry

The key to having an effortless life is to eliminate the resistance your mind is constantly generating to everyone and everything that is happening in your reality.
I was sharing with don Miguel one day that the Borg on Star Trek say "Resistance is Futile!". But indeed this is not true at all, at least not for us humans.
Resistance is not futile, it is in fact your minds number one strategy for keeping you imprisoned in a life of drama, frustration and irritation. Make a note when you feel resistance in your body and realize you have no control over what other people do or say or the things that often happen in life. Make a choice in that moment to let go and stop resisting!
How do you weave your way though life having fun and with an open heart? Simple, identify the things that exist within you that are creating conflict and you will see your life change before your very eyes!

Giving your Power Away!

Take some time to consider how much time you spend giving your power away to others in your day. When you are in any situation, what do you do when you start to find yourself getting upset? For how long do you remain upset? Have you taken the time to ask yourself why are you taking that situation personally?

Life is constantly happening around us. Our perception of what is going on is filtered through our belief system and all that we "know" to be truth. At that point we then react to what we are experiencing according to our point of view about life. Of course this point of view is not necessarily truth. In the end though, based on what we believe, we end up taking actions that are not the healthiest for us or others.

There is no need to go into reaction about anything or get upset about anything. You can be calm all day. Just see what is going on clearly and ask yourself the questions above. This is to prevent you from giving your personal power away in the form of your fear-based emotions. And that will make a huge difference in your life.