Dear Sheri,
I love dogs... My first dog that died was only two years old and her kidneys gave out. I tried to get her on a dialysis machine, but they were not available then. Her heart started failing.. She was in the vet hospital and with much regret I consented to have her put to sleep.
The second dog lived with me for 15.5 years. She had bile leaking into her stomach and there was nothing the vets could do for her. They gave her an operation which made the situation worse. Despite the fight I put up for her, I had to let her go, but this time I would not let the vets give her an injection. I fought that she should go in her own time. This caused considerable distress to the vets, but I knew she was not in pain, and I felt I was respecting her journey by allowing her to go in her own time... which she did.
I have a dog now who is 13 and who has a malignant tumour. The vets say that they should put her down now. Again I don't agree. I have made an appointment with a homoepathic vet who says they have had success with tumours and can make her life more comfortable. The current vets say they can give her palliative care, but as far as I can see will fill her with drugs. Under healthy normal circumstances I would expect for her to live for another 18 months.
My question to you is, I know she is responsible for her part of the love/respect relationship we have, but 1. Do I have the right to end her life? 2. Do I have the right to keep trying to prolong her life? 3. Should I just let this tumour take her life without doing anything? If so, how much pain do I allow her to go through.
At the moment, I want to fight for her comfort without poisoning her body. I don't think I have the power to prolong her life. I know this is my mind torturing me, and I think it is not the treatment that is worrying me, I am projecting fear into the future about what I should do if she is in pain or really ill.
I would appreciate your assistance with this if that is okay.
A Pet Lover
Dear Pet Lover,
I think the question becomes do you REALLY know what the dog is feeling? As a doctor, I can tell you that humans feel pretty bad when they are dying (especially from tumors which ARE painful) and most of them would welcome a faster way to die. But we can't do that yet in our society - because family can have so many agendas that these things cannot be trusted. Personally - I would not want to hang around for 18 months dying slowly. I would prefer to live my life to the fullest and then go at that time. Of course I would want to make sure I was terminal first and had tried different treatments.
But the bottom line is this: I often see that people are not willing to let their pets go, not because they are truly offended by the vets suggestion but because of their own selfishness. Only you angel can determine the place you are coming from in all this. Perhaps the question is what would you want for yourself if it were you? There are no "right" answers here.
Blessings & love, Sheri
