Hi Sheri
I think I am having a mini meltdown and I need your help. I have been unemployed for over a year and live with my boyfriend. He pays all the bills and I feel like I am not contributing anything. I am the "domestic goddess" but I feel like he'll resent me one day for not doing more. He says he's ok with me not having a job and that he's happy when I am, but I am uneasy just staying at home. One day I plan on having a family with him, but I feel like I feel like I need to be working too. I've started to volunteer at a high school so I don't feel so bad, but I have just been out of the loop for so long that I feel like I don't have a place in the world. Why do you think that I feel like if I don't have a job, that I don't exist?
Please help
Thanks
Dear Goddess,
The solution is very simple - and is what I like to call the "what is."
Either get a job and work - or stop focusing negatively on not working and stop making up stories about resentments that have not even happened.
That is the bottom line. Most of the time we are unhappy because of our thinking. If staying home has you thinking all this self-deprecating nonsense then get out and get busy creating. Personally, I don't feel that anyone should be doing nothing all day. We were created to make beauty in this world. So go forth and do something wonderful. But keep your fear-based fantasies about your partner out of the mix.
Your statement about feeling that if you do not have a job you do not exist is not truth. To me what you are REALLY saying is that you feel guilty for being home all day and are worried that in the future you will pay for that decision.
You job in life is to make yourself happy. If you cannot do that your relationships will not work out - plain and simple.
Blessings & love, Sheri
www.journeysofthespirit.com
